A great line from Kevin Bridges.
I was a fat kid at school, I was the first to get tits in my class.
Tell us a joke Page 281
What's the difference between my mother's legs and my mother's living room? You take your shoes off before you enter her living room.
I nearly got this as a present for you, but the wipeable pages edition doesn't come out until Christmas
I was secretly doing a painting the other day
And my wife caught me in the act
"It's not what it looks like" I said
But that's because I'm a terrible painter
Quote: Steve Sunshine @ 2nd September 2022, 1:55 AMI was secretly doing a painting the other day
And my wife caught me in the act
"It's not what it looks like" I said
But that's because I'm a terrible painter
Good one! ?
Quote: Steve Sunshine @ 2nd September 2022, 1:55 AMI was secretly doing a painting the other day
And my wife caught me in the act
"It's not what it looks like" I said
But that's because I'm a terrible painter
That's a really good gag, but I think it needs a little something to justify the panicked comment. How about:
I was painting my secretary naked the other day, and my wife walked in.
I said "this isn't what it looks like!"
But then I am a pretty bad painter.
Cheers Gappy
I just made it up for here so hadn't quite workshopped it
I definitely like your edit
Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 1st September 2022, 4:33 PMI nearly got this as a present for you, but the wipeable pages edition doesn't come out until Christmas
Awesome. I guess she's trying to get the boring part of her life out of the way before she finally plucks up the courage to propose to me. Life begins at 48.
I know this is a bit cruel, but just before he died (not after, that'd be tough, unless you're Freddie Mercury), John Lennon was writing a song called Life Begins At Forty. Ouch.
Who Wants To Live Forever? Probably not you Freddie, or you wouldn't be ramming 603 dicks and 87534 kilos of cocaine up your jacksie.
Mel C always came over as nice but unsure of who she was. Mel B was more strongly defined, I wonder what Mel A would have been like ?
I also came over Mel C and it was nice.
Honestly, what a bunch of slappers. Sporty had something, but otherwise I never understood what all the fuss was about.
Iggy Pop's looking well
What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson menstruating.
I think my mother has a cold. She says she wants to get her lips round a fisherman's friend.
Quote: Steve Sunshine @ 2nd September 2022, 1:55 AMI was secretly doing a painting the other day
And my wife caught me in the act
"It's not what it looks like" I said
But that's because I'm a terrible painter
Yes that is a good joke but the surprise might be stronger if you skipped the first line.
I love the way I churn out joke after joke and no one gives a f**k... Then the second anyone else gets involved, it's feedback time.
My herb patch is overgrown. I asked my good friend John Lennon what to do. He said, Clean up thyme.
Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 6th September 2022, 9:14 AMI love the way I churn out joke after joke .
I hadn't noticed.