British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 2,421

Quote: lofthouse @ 6th June 2022, 10:42 PM

He won't go unless somebody physically drags him out by his hair

He's like a turd that you just can't seem to flush

It's all good news.
Rebels have tasted blood.
Lots of bad news on the horizon.
They'll tell us to 'move on' but we're going nowhere.
It's drinks all round at my place!

People forget that it is the media who will again decide the next general election........

Lisa Nandy

Can a fork lift truck biologically have a penis and if so should they be able to compete in schoolgirl judo events?

Don't tell me you are going to refer it all to a Commission.

Just answer these simple questions.

Etc.

Latest betting from William Hill:

Boris Johnson exit date: June 22 12/1; Jul - Sept 22 5/2; Oct - Dec 22 9/2; 2023 9/4; 2024 or later 2/1.

Next Conservative leader: Hunt 9/2; Mordaunt 6/1; Truss 7/1; Tugendhat 7/1; Wallace 8/1; Sunak9/1.

Next PM: Starmer 11/2; Hunt 11/2; Tugendhat 8/1; Truss 8/1; Mordaunt 8/1; Sunak 10/1.

Next Labour leader: Burnham 9/2; Streeting 6/1; Reeves 7/1; Nandy 7/1; Rayner 10/1; Cooper 12/1.

33/1 Marcus Rashford to become an MP before 2050. I shall be 96 by the time that bet is settled so I don't think I'll bother.

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 7th June 2022, 11:32 AM

Latest betting from William Hill:

Boris Johnson exit date: June 22 12/1; Jul - Sept 22 5/2; Oct - Dec 22 9/2; 2023 9/4; 2024 or later 2/1.

Next Conservative leader: Hunt 9/2; Mordaunt 6/1; Truss 7/1; Tugendhat 7/1; Wallace 8/1; Sunak9/1.

Next PM: Starmer 11/2; Hunt 11/2; Tugendhat 8/1; Truss 8/1; Mordaunt 8/1; Sunak 10/1.

Next Labour leader: Burnham 9/2; Streeting 6/1; Reeves 7/1; Nandy 7/1; Rayner 10/1; Cooper 12/1.

33/1 Marcus Rashford to become an MP before 2050. I shall be 96 by the time that bet is settled so I don't think I'll bother.

Elizabeths could have said that in 1994 and she would have looked a right Charlie now if she had done so.

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 7th June 2022, 11:32 AM

Latest betting from William Hill:

Boris Johnson exit date: June 22 12/1; Jul - Sept 22 5/2; Oct - Dec 22 9/2; 2023 9/4; 2024 or later 2/1.

Next Conservative leader: Hunt 9/2; Mordaunt 6/1; Truss 7/1; Tugendhat 7/1; Wallace 8/1; Sunak9/1.

Next PM: Starmer 11/2; Hunt 11/2; Tugendhat 8/1; Truss 8/1; Mordaunt 8/1; Sunak 10/1.

Next Labour leader: Burnham 9/2; Streeting 6/1; Reeves 7/1; Nandy 7/1; Rayner 10/1; Cooper 12/1.

33/1 Marcus Rashford to become an MP before 2050. I shall be 96 by the time that bet is settled so I don't think I'll bother.

Odds a bit mean on Hunt? A lot pf the Pro-Boris lot have him down as a swine and traitor - he might struggle.
I think the PM odds are about right - he'll either go in early Autumn or hang on till the GE (when he'll be booted out with rest of them, God willing!)

Quote: Lazzard @ 7th June 2022, 12:03 PM

(when he'll be booted out with rest of them, God willing!)

Unfortunately, whatever happens, there'll still be 650 of them in situ.

I am reading rumours that Keir Starmer has been across Ang.
This from Labour MP's.

He'd better leave Ange alone
Otherwise I'll punch him in the hooter

Rayner is the only true spark in that party, she's hilarious in the mistakes she makes but she has old fashioned Labour heart. I think Starmer fears her popularity in the party and thinks they'd rather have her as leader now. The contrast is affecting his rating as leader and you'd think he'd stab her in the back at his first chance, such an ambitious slimeball he seems to be. But he can't demote her because of Labour's peculiar electoral system. Ha ha.

What gets me about Starmer is that for a QC his advocacy skills are appalling. For me Ed Miliband or Andy Burnham would do a much better job of puttng Spaffer through his paces. As for Rayner I think she's a phoney with no depth and is being used as a form of tokenism by a Knight of the Realm who is passing himself off as 'The man in the street '

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 8th June 2022, 8:09 PM

I am reading rumours that Keir Starmer has been across Ang.
This from Labour MP's.

And Zac Goldsmith's knocking off Carrie.
So?

It would explained why his spokesman denied that the two of them were having a pint of beer and a meal together,

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 9th June 2022, 9:49 AM

It would explained why his spokesman denied that the two of them were having a pint of beer and a meal together,

Not why she posted pics of herself at the meeting on FaceBook, though.

As far as I can tell it's a classic Social Media Generated Conspiracy Theory/Rumour. No actual evidence, just a lot of people with too much time on their hands amd an agenda to push putting two and two together to make five.

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 9th June 2022, 9:49 AM

It would explained why his spokesman denied that the two of them were having a pint of beer and a meal together,

If morailty is now on the ticket that suits me down to the ground.
There are two by elections in the pipeline one is because a Tory MP was a child abuser the other is for a Tory MP was watching porn in the Commons.
And unlike the crap you're trying to spout these are facts not fiction. For me its better to If you stick with the facts, otherwise you come across as nasty as well as oafish .

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