British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 2,367

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 17th March 2022, 3:07 PM

I've no idea what that concoction at the top is but it looks most unappetising (I'm assuming it's supposed to be eaten?).

Poutine is practically the national dish of your Canadian brethren, although it's crossed over our border, too. It's fries/chips and cheese curds covered in brown gravy. It's surprisingly tasty, and I see it on the menu at many brewpubs. It pairs well with a nice beer or two.

A bell-end tied himself to the goal posts at Everton last night with a tie-wrap around his neck.
But what was funnier was the 4ft bolt cutters they brought out to cut him free.
A thin plastic tie-wrap, not a hardened steel chain.

The odd thing was that they got the bolt cutters off a man in the stands. Why he had them inside his coat is anyone's guess.

It's how he got in...

The royal family has invited Putin to visit. Please accept... Royal family - Russian politician - what could possibly go wrong?

I kept hearing the word manpads concerning the Ukraine.
I thought 'yeah, I'd probably need them if I lived in Kiev.
Then I read they'd brought 2 Russian jets down with manpads.
Good shot, did they stick on the cockpit windows

Aah, Man Portable Air Defence Systems.

I thought similar when hearing their name. I expect our squaddies had a good laugh when they were told what their new lethal weapon was called. I bet they were relieved as well when they actually saw it.

It gladdens my heart when I hear Zelenskyy (yes, I copied and pasted that!) saying they'd downed 100 Russian jets so far - surely what with that, the unrest in their troops and the Russian families having to bury their sons, there will an upsurge against this despicable tyrant war criminal.

That's my hope, anyway.

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 21st March 2022, 9:14 AM

It gladdens my heart when I hear Zelenskyy (yes, I copied and pasted that!) saying they'd downed 100 Russian jets so far - surely what with that, the unrest in their troops and the Russian families having to bury their sons, there will an upsurge against this despicable tyrant war criminal.

That's my hope, anyway.

I'm afraid it's a big country with lots of cannon fodder.

Quote: Chappers @ 21st March 2022, 8:48 PM

I'm afraid it's a big country with lots of cannon fodder.

Yes, but thankfully Putin is finding it not as easy to crack as he hoped, so let's hope his "troops" in the Krem get the men in white coats to take him away soon, to the funny farm

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 21st March 2022, 8:04 AM

Aah, Man Portable Air Defence Systems.

Saw them in use against a tripod in War of the Worlds but I expect it was just special effects. I reckon you'd need more than one to bring down a chopper, let alone a fighter jet at a distance. Mobile shortrange weapon that can deter choppers getting too close and anything else a bonus would be my guess. Our star streak thing's needed for the Migs but requires thorough training.

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 21st March 2022, 9:14 AM

surely what with the unrest in their troops and the Russian families having to bury their sons, there will an upsurge against this despicable tyrant war criminal.

That's the general feeling now but this is a bloke who keeps his distance from anyone and has plenty of escape routes, he won't be easy to nab. He could as easily conduct the war from his secret bunker in Siberia.

Quote: Alfred J Kipper @ 22nd March 2022, 12:25 AM

I reckon you'd need more than one to bring down a chopper, let alone a fighter jet at a distance.

Distance and altitude are limitations, but Stingers and their 1 kilo warhead are more than capable of downing aircraft. They get much of the credit for turning the tide in Afghanistan after we armed the Taliban with them as they fought the Soviets in the early 80s.

The big concern is that some of the weapons we are providing Ukraine might fall into the wrong hands someday. Imagine terrorists with Stingers knocking down airliners, or attacking heads of state with Javelins.

Hmm, I know terrorists want to use them and the Russians have already captured dozens themselves. I wonder if they can design a way to make the warheads 'go off' after a short 'use by date' so they'd be useless in enemy hands. Surely there's some high tech way of disabling them if captured.

Quote: Alfred J Kipper @ 22nd March 2022, 1:26 AM

Surely there's some high tech way of disabling them if captured.

Possibly in firmware or via geofencing.

Yes that's what I was thinking. ?

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