Any good and does it need the last line?
[Tyrolean guest house. A young couple are coming down to breakfast. They are met are at the bottom of the stairs by the owner]
Owner:
Guden Morgan Herr Jones Freulein Jones. I trust you slept well?
Mr. Jones:
Yes thanks. Wonderful room
Mrs. Jones:
Fantastic views.
Owner:
Yes, ze Austrian countryside is magnificent. Please, come viz me to ze dining room.
[They do so. When they get there there are two guests already sat down. A man who is the spitting image of Hitler and a younger blonde woman. He is doing a crossword with pencil in hand]
Owner:
Mr and Mrs Jones zis is Herr Fittler and his vife Eva Fittler.
[The Jones’s stand there stunned.]
Fittler:
Guden Morgan
[Eva smiles at the couple]
BEAT.
Owner:
Please sit down
[They do so opposite each other and look at each other dubiously]
Fittler:
I said Guden Morgan.
Mr. Jones:
Oh sorry! Still half asleep. Good Morning.
Mrs. Jones:
Morning.
Owner:
I vill bring your breakfasts shortly.
[She leaves. Awkward silence]
Mrs. Jones:
Have you been here long?
Fittler:
Nein, ve arrived in ze night. Only got here just in time for check in. Ve have blitzed our vay across Europe eh Eva?
[Eva smiles. The Jones’s look at each other]
Mr. Jones:
What are you driving?
Fittler:
A Volkswagon.
Mr. Jones:
Nice.
Mrs. Jones:
Ooh Darling, that reminds me. You did get fully comprehensive European car insurance didn’t you?
[To Fittlers]
We had a little bump on the way here.
Mr. Jones:
Yes dear. I got it with Churchill
[Fittler snaps his pencil point. He looks disgusted at Mr. Jones but takes another pencil out and continues]
Fittler:
Eva my dear. ‘Tips hot liquid from mouth with force’. Four and four. First letter ‘s’
Mrs. Jones:
Ooh I’m good at these. Hmmm…..got it! Spit Fire.
[Fittler breaks another pencil point. Looks disgusted at Mrs. Jones. He stands]
Fittler:
Zat voz ze final solution!
[Walks out of dining room]
Fittler:
Freulein Goosestepping, fire up ze gas oven.
Cheers Soots
