British Comedy Guide

FLICK OF A SWITCH

OFFICE
A man is sat across the table to another man in an interview scenario.

BOSS
So Mr Jones basically all I need you to be able to do would be simple wiring work nothing elaborate.

MR JONES
What I would I be wiring?

BOSS
Trap doors

MR JONES
Trap doors?

BOSS
That's all I do

MR JONES
Do you get much work?

BOSS
I'm flat out they've never been more popular

MR JONES
To be honest I've been in the game for years and I've never heard of anyone getting one fitted

BOSS
Of course, you haven't, it's all hush hush

MR JONES
So how simple is this wiring?

The Boss picks up a large sample board and points at each example as he speaks
BOSS
Now this is our basic model the 'Ambassador'. Which as you can see is a doorbell that'S fitted under the desk. Once pressed the trap door will drop open. Then they close it back by hand .

This is the 'Imperial' as you can see this is a more elaborate toggle switch again wired under the desk and once pressed it will open the trap door and then close it again automatically

Then we have the 'Presidential' which is a buzzer that once pressed will open the trap door, close it and at the same time illuminate a 'Next' sign on the outside of the office door

MR JONES
They look simple enough, I suppose I'll be working all over the place

BOSS
You will but you won't know it, as only I will know the customers full address for security reasons

MR JONES
Then how do I get to the jobs?

BOSS
I drive to the jobs you'll be in the back on the van with a hood on. I don't take that off until you're in the property and the curtains are drawn so you never know where you are?

MR JONES
F**k that if you think I'm driving round hooded in the back of a van, you need a f**king Gimp not an electrician, you're off your f**king rocker

The Boss presses a buzzer Mr Jones disappears then the empty seat reappears.

There is then a knock on the office door

BOSS
Come in, can I help you?

A reluctant looking man enters.

MAN
The Next sign lit up , my names Mr Smith I've come about the electricians job

BOSS
Take a seat

Nice and simple but satisfying, I think Forest must have one fitted in the managers office...

I probably should have seen that coming, but I didn't. Fun little sketch.

You might also be interested to know I thought it was called FUCK OF A SWITCH!

Funny but I could see the punchline coming. If you slimmed it down there's be less time to figure out what was going to happen.

Thanks for the read people I sort of knew going into it that anything involving trap doors ends in trap doors, but I went ahead regardless. Its as though I wanted to give the game away I fear I may be becoming reckless.
The truth is that it was silly enough to carry on as I do love silly. :P
PS Gappy in fairness I can't be held responsible for your mucky mind.

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ 3rd October 2021, 12:03 PM

PS Gappy in fairness I can't be held responsible for your mucky mind.

No, I blame continued exposure to Monkhouse.

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