B Movie for a wet Wednesday afternoon

SCENE: Police station front desk evening.
A man in a heavy coat and pyjamas is talking to a uniformed sergeant.
MAN:
"I know you're going to think that I'm mad when I tell you what's happened to me. Then again I bet you hear all sorts in your job ."
SERGEANT:
"I must admit I've heard my fair share sir"
MAN:
"I thought that, as I've been mulling it over for hours. And I reckon that if I told you it would only increase your scepticism. So, what if I just did this"
The man points at the station doors and they close.
SERGEANT:
"What does a draft tell me?"
MAN:
"It wasn't a draft it was me I did it, it started a few hours ago watch this "
The man points at a mug on the desk and it levitates a foot in the air.

The Sergeant remains nonchalant and cranes his head toward the station doors.

SERGEANT:
"So, what are you then some sort of magician? Is this on camera? If you're planning on putting this on You Tube you can think again sunshine this is a police station and I'm a police officer and it's illegal to ..."

The man cuts him short.
MAN:
"It's not a trick, watch!"

The man points at a bank of metal filing cabinets and makes them levitate
MAN: cont
"As I said I only noticed I could do it a few hours ago and I've been racking my brains about what to do. I didn't go to the hospital because I don't think its medical, but I do think the authorities should know about it that's why I've come here right away"

SERGEANT:
"Well this is a pickle, by 'Authorities' I presume you mean me? My Inspectors off with the flu you see."
MAN:
"I was hoping you could contact the government you know and ...."
SERGEANT:
"Contact the government! How would I go about that sir? The best we have is emergency contacts for the water and electric people RSPCA etc but it's not like we have the phone number for the Number 10 now is it? "
The man is crestfallen.
MAN:
"I was rather hoping that..."

SERGEANT:
"I mean its not like in science fiction films is it? I can't just make one call and then have the place swarming with boffins in trench coats knocking their pipes out on the radiators"
MAN:
"Should I tell my MP?"
SERGEANT:
"You'd be wasting your time there sir the local MP's a Green. And most people seem to think she's got a screw loose as it is after she demanded bicycle lanes and baby changing stations on all motorways. So, I doubt the PM will get out of bed for her especially as she's claiming someone has got 'Superpowers'"
The enormity of the situation really hits the man, and he gazes at his hands as he speaks.

MAN:
"I have, haven't I? I've got superpowers!"
SERGEANT:
"I'll tell you what I could call the Bomb Squad, they're army and we've got their number. Why don't I ring them. They'll keep hold of you , no worries there"
MAN:
"What do mean keep hold of me?"
SERGEANT:
"I'm just presuming that you know from all the stuff I've read and the films I've seen. They usually keep hold of your sort"
MAN:
"What do you mean 'My sort'
SERGEANT:
"Sorry sir no disrespect intended. But you've have seen that stuff yourself. They'll bring scientist in and you'll have to have all those tests etc. And no doubt they'll have the army keep an eye on you till they can work out if you're dangerous , you know for the safety of the nation and all that."

The rather jovial sergeant picks up a pen as the now very reluctant looking man starts sweating.
SERGEANT:
"Right then sir let's start with your name and address shall we so that the army can..."

The man waves his hands to signal the sergeant to stop and speaks as he walks out of the station.
MAN:
"Look its ok I don't want to report it I'm going home , if it hasn't worn off by the morning, I'll come back... honest "
The rather disappointed sergeant drops his pen.
SERGEANT:
"Very good sir, they do say a good nights kip can solve most things"

As the man leaves a constable brings a cup of tea to the sergeant.

CONSTABLE:
"Was that another one with X ray vision then sarge?"
SERGEANT:
"No, this one could levitate stuff, he had that filing cabinet over there three foot in the air"
CONSTABLE
"There was one in earlier who could smell colours!"
SERGEANT:
"Well whatever it was in that spill on the link road that we've been told to cover up , they reckon the effects should wear off after 24 hours"

Very good.TP
As I read it I imagined the sergeant to be Oscar Blaketon.

Thanks for the read of it John I just had a B movie on in the background as I was working my day job this afternoon and this came to me so I banged it out and stuck it up as I rather liked it. I thought the punch could be better but that the premise was strong.
As for the sergeant I always picture Lionel Jefferies as Nosey Parker in 'The Wrong arm of the law' as he is the best comical plod there ever was or will be the man was a genius.

I wasn't expecting it.

Nice gentle pastiche, I like it.

There's only 1 Green MP in the Commons, though, so it does look as though you're specifically satirising one individual. Maybe you are.

I never gave it much thought but if it came to the crunch I could just caller her an 'Eco Independent' thanks for the read as well Gappy.

Good stuff.

I can't read a police station scene without visualising Dereck Guyler behind the desk.

Nice one, TP. I do like your writing.

Are you open for suggestions? Maybe the Constable could be revealed with his own comical mutation, "Do you think he noticed me?".

Thanks for the read mate and what you say would work as well.

Hi Teddy, I really liked it but I think you could trim a lot of words from it and not lose anything.

No doubt Will , it was as always just an exercise and like most things I do I would work my arse off to tighten it up if it was going anywhere. Sadly it will remain like all my stuff, simply an exercise but thanks for the read and the advice.