Hi all,
Haven't put anything up for crit in a while. Comments appreciated.
EXT. PORCH – NIGHT
RICHARD AND SCOTT CANOODLE.
RICHARD:
You sure you don't want to come in?
SCOTT:
(LAUGHING) Go on then, you've twisted my arm.
RICHARD UNLOCKS THE FRONT DOOR.
INT. LOUNGE – CONTINUOUS
THE TWO MEN STUMBLE IN. RICHARD FLICKS ON THE LIGHT, AND -
- A CROWD OF REVELLERS LEAP FROM BEHIND THE FURNITURE.
CROWD:
Surprise!
SCOTT AND RICHARD JUST ABOUT JUMP OUT OF THEIR SKINS.
THE ROOM IS DECORATED WITH BALLOONS SHAPED LIKE PENISES. A GIANT BANNER READS "RICHARD'S COMING OUT!" MADONNA PLAYS ON THE STEREO.
MUM:
Hello, son!
DAD:
(SHAKING SCOTT'S HAND)
You must be the lucky lady!
SCOTT:
Erm... hi.
RICHARD:
What's going on, mum?
MUM:
It's your gay shower!
RICHARD:
Gay shower?
DAD:
Of course! Everyone's here! Look - Granny Rice came!
GRANNY WEARS A GIANT STRAP-ON PHALLUS.
MUM:
And Sarah. You remember your old girlfriend, Sarah?
SARAH WAVES WEAKLY, CLOSE TO TEARS.
DAD:
And the village people.
A MOUSTACHIOD COP PUTS A HAND ON RICHARD'S SHOULDER.
COP:
Can I get you a daiquiri, Richard?
RICHARD:
No! I don't want this! I don't want any of this!
THE NEEDLE TEARS ACROSS THE RECORD. THE CROWD FALLS DEATHLY QUIET. MUM AND DAD LOOK CRESTFALLEN.
MUM:
We just wanted to be supportive, Richard.
DAD:
We're sorry we offended you.
ALL AROUND ARE DISAPPOINTED FACES. THE COP LOOKS PARTICULARLY HANGDOG.
RICHARD:
(GUILTY)
No, I'm sorry. This is really nice. You just took me by surprise. Thanks a lot, guys!
THE CROWD CHEERS. MADONNA COMES BACK ON THE STEREO.
SCOTT:
(HOLDING RICHARD'S HAND)
Wow. All this and we haven't even slept together yet.
DAD:
Slept together?!
MUM:
You sick f**ks!
CROWD:
Bummers!
THE CROWD PELTS THEM WITH DILDOS.
