Quote: Kenny Bania @ 2nd October 2020, 10:25 AMMy unloved entries this week ( and a completely different range of subjects to yours, Dantrobus )
Waitrose have started selling bags of autumn leaves, risking putting both their reputation and their products on the line
A cat has taken hundreds of selfies on an ipad after being left alone indoors. The cats owner described the sight that greeted her on the device as pussy galore
A conspiracy theorist stole a truck, claiming he didn't want to be late for a meeting with space aliens. Although he needn't have worried about being on time, as the aliens began their leg of the journey with Southern Rail
It's been a bad week for two leading double glazing firms after they were accused of mis-selling customers. And a bad week for one customer who was persuaded to buy a glass ceiling, window dressing and a glazed scallop
It's been a good week for foliage fans as Waitrose have started selling bags of autumn leaves. And a good week for their customers who now have an environmentally friendly alternative if toilet paper isn't available
Pussy Galore is witty and I like your last GWBW.
Quote: skram @ 2nd October 2020, 11:09 AMI thought there were a couple of decent one-liners on the show this week, but I don't follow their logic in having sketches that don't have any jokes in them (*cough*). Anyway, here are my one-liners, not sure whether they were rejected or lost in email but it's the same result!
BREAKING NEWS:
1. A top lawyer has banned the wearing of woollen cardigans and jumpers in her office, leading staff to complain it's no longer a close-knit environment.2. After a village in Norfolk was hit by a sand storm, residents complained that the streets had become deserted.
3. The United States is rushing to deal with a brain-eating microbe that has been detected in water supplies - however officials at the White House fear they might already be too late.
GOOD WEEK/BAD WEEK:
1. It's been a bad week for savers as the Bank Of England warns that interest rates could turn negative; it's been a good week for the Lib Dems who have been asked to help explain what it means to receive no interest.2. It's been a good week for Prince George after he was given a shark tooth fossil by Sir David Attenborough; it's been a bad week for Prince Andrew after Malta demanded the return of all of the Royals' prehistoric predators.
3. It's been a good week for UK wind farms as Boris Johnson suggested they could become the "Saudi Arabia of wind power"; it's been a bad week for the wind turbines as if they don't work properly they will get their arms chopped off.
These all work well for me
The sand one is a good idea. I guess the subtlety of it may be too great as when the word 'deserted' is read out it may not work as well as it does on paper possibly.