Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 28th April 2020, 1:24 PMThis post Is off topic.
Oh yeah sorry...
Ok er....where were we?
WE'RE ALL GONNA FUCKING DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Coronavirus Page 46
There's that great Woody Allen quote: I'm not afraid of dying, as long as I get to bonk my daughter first.
Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 28th April 2020, 1:58 PMThere's that great Woody Allen quote: I'm not afraid of dying, as long as I get to bonk my daughter first.
Ha, yes.
Life's full of ironies.
I've spent most of the last year secretly injecting bats in my bedroom with deadly poison to see if I can have an all powerful say on how the world ends.
Nothing happened.
But my little cat Lucky, bless her, just went out to chase a robin and everyone in my road suddenly developed mild symptoms of coronavirus.
Studies are mounting to show that smokers have a much lower risk with coronavirus. The world's most international tobacco group is BATS - British American Tobacco. Nicotiana Benthamiana, a close relative of the tobacco plant, is being used by Medicago to develop a potential vaccine. Frankly, that totally misses the point. Given the origin of the virus was in bats, it is patently obvious to me that it is being caught by people who are standing between those four letters in lower case and the same four letters in upper case. Men in particular are more affected because they are not, other than in exceptional circumstances, six feet wide. Therefore, they can't adequately socially distance their DNAs from their nads.
In the face of ever-increasing rejection of lockdown restrictions, Boris appears to be watering down the conditions for easing those restrictions officially.
Not only are huge numbers of people refusing to observe those restrictions but his own government wants them eased (or removed) in order that businesses can reopen and the economy can start to recover.
As has been said many times on this thread already, we're all doomed! 
As soon as I read the name Boris I thought the same thing.
When Donald Trump said that he would consider exploring the use of injecting disinfectants into the body to treat coronavirus, the medical community shuddered due to the dangerous and irresponsible implications of this suggestion.
But people certainly listened to his words as officials from the Maryland Emergency Management Agency sent out an alert one day after receiving more than 100 calls about ingesting disinfectants as a possible treatment for COVID-19, according to the Governor's office, and reported by ABC News.
There's a lunatic in charge of the asylum..
Quote: lofthouse @ 28th April 2020, 11:17 PMWhen Donald Trump said that he would consider exploring the use of injecting disinfectants into the body to treat coronavirus, the medical community shuddered due to the dangerous and irresponsible implications of this suggestion.
But people certainly listened to his words as officials from the Maryland Emergency Management Agency sent out an alert one day after receiving more than 100 calls about ingesting disinfectants as a possible treatment for COVID-19, according to the Governor's office, and reported by ABC News.
There's a lunatic in charge of the asylum..
Yes. What a pity he didn't try it on himself first. We might all then be sleeping more easily in our beds.
You sometimes find something - well, I do - which instinctively feels like it could be a key moment in history. I believe I have just heard and seen one. BBC News and elsewhere - "Coronavirus: Mike Pence flouts rule on masks at hospital."
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-52465172
On the surface it looks outrageous and there is now a lot of moaning about it but maybe people should think on. Mr Pence had coronavirus In early March, came through it, and has regular tests for it. Currently he is negative. He is no risk to the patients. If he acquires coronavirus again, then we will know that having had it once gives no immunity. If he doesn't, we won't know it guarantees immunity but the more he walks around without a mask preferably with daily tests the more we will see that that's likely. In parallel, it is a nose thumb to WHO which keeps changing its mind on the mask issue so that the advice remains unclear and virologists who insist that everyone must do what they as individuals say.
On a psychological level, it implies that well people can keep most well by expecting unwell people to take the most responsibility for reducing spread. Physically, that isn't possible unless all the public can regularly test themselves but it does have something quite profound to say on getting the thing culturally into a more appropriate perspective. Laboratory academics can't hog the limelight for ever more as big power. There is an unanswered question about their broader psychology and politicians do need a way of testing that out. And I guess if President Trump was to be taken ill, not that he has any plans in that regard and personally I hope he can stay well, it places Mr Pence in a stronger position to lead.
So, yep, there is a bit of strategic, if edgy, cleverness there and he knows it.
Not re Trump who can trust him but re the virus narrative.
I've never had much of an opinion on Mike Pence one way or the other but I found this a bit Eisenhower impressive.
(and, yes, I do know that Eisenhower had a lot of weaknesses as well as a lot of strengths but, hey, different times)
Or, if he wears one ,everyone would want one and they haven't got enough and that would expose their unpreparedness 
Smurf Covid19 death toll has increased by 847,868 in the last 3 seconds and the total Smurf death toll is now at 2,933,541.
Death data addicts and doomsday subscribers are complaining the death toll is insufficiently dramatic to sate their lust for universal cataclysm. Papa Smurf, who was last week photographed reading a Little Chef menu, has threatened to start doing Sudoku puzzles if he doesn't receive more favorable press coverage for his handling of the virus.
Can't believe Trump didn't come up with a cure. He's let me down again.
According to reports, men who catch coronavirus are about 2.5 times more likely to die from the disease than a woman is.
That might be fascinating from a purely medical viewpoint but, for all practical purposes, the solution to that problem seems blindingly obvious.
Every man diagnosed with coronavirus should immediately identify as a woman.
If he does that, his chances will become the same as a woman's because he'll be a woman.
I mean, that has to happen, doesn't it?
Unless, of course, identifying as a woman doesn't actually mean he's a woman.
But we all know it does, right?
Quote: Rood Eye @ 29th April 2020, 7:55 AMUnless, of course, identifying as a woman doesn't actually mean he's a woman.
Next you'll be saying Bruce Jenner is just a guy who got his nuts cut off and his cock inverted. And then ran over someone. It's a shame this world is still populated by intolerant retards who can't see past biology, science and fact.
There are reports today that private schools in Britain might be reopening before state schools, primarily because of differences in pupil density.
That's not to say state pupils are less intelligent than private pupils: it's simply that they are considerably denser in terms of their numbers per unit area of the school.
The answer to overcrowding is to have either fewer pupils per classroom or larger classrooms per class, and that is virtually impossible in a state school while being a realistic proposition in many private schools because, over the years, private schools have been spending money on sports halls, theatres and other large spaces that state schools simply can't afford.
Such large spaces can, in the current crisis, be utilised as teaching areas in which social distancing is easily achieved.
Under the circumstances, one can't help but wonder what is going to happen to the education of state pupils.
I have already written to Gavin Williamson, Secretary of State for education, suggesting that instead of requiring those pupils to attend school, they be allowed to stay at home playing video games until they're 18 and then admitted automatically to the university of their choice.
I mean, come on - we all know that's the way British education was heading anyway.
Don't we?