I wonder if any of you could offer alternatives to what I have making the song funnier?
Can't Take my Eye off You
A man walked into a restaurant, looking for a meal
Sees a woman, So refined and genteel
So beautiful was she, he thought he would die
And at that moment she sneezed, An across the room flew her eye
The man caught the eye, With the skill of Dr Grace
Gave it subtly to the woman , Who put it back in her face
She said would you join me, At hosting I'm good
He said my fair lady , I most certainly would
She said would you join me, At hosting I'm good
He said my fair lady , I most certainly would
She chose the best wine, And she chose the best dish
A French sauvignon, And a Portuguese swordfish
Her best two assets, Were there on display
For breasts like that, He'd often had to pay
Conversation flowed, Like the best champagne
He wished the night would never end, He wanted to remain
She said Will you join me, At dancing I'm good
He said my fair Lady, I most certainly would
He said my fair Lady, I most certainly would
2
They got to the nightclub, It was the best he'd ever seen
The fittings were plush, And even the toilets were clean
The music was great, The dancing was divine
He even enjoyed, The Hokey Cokey line
He felt like the Fred Astaire, With his top hat and cane
He wished the night would never end, He wanted to remain
She said Will you join me, At loving I'm good
He said my fair Lady, I most certainly would
She said Will you join me, At loving I'm good
He said my fair Lady, I most certainly would
3
Even in the bedroom , She really blew his mind
She showed him pleasure spots, He'd never thought he'd find
She delivered every dream, And fulfilled every fantasy
Even her barking, Filled him with ecstasy
And when they'd finished, He wanted to start again
He wished the night would never end, He wanted to remain
(breaking music, this bit sang soulfully)
He woke up in the morning
The drink had took its toll
His head felt like it was filled with rocks
When he began to roll
Onto his back with one eye open
And what did he see
No horror in the morning
Just a vision there for he
She said Will you join me, At cooking I'm good
He said my fair Lady, I most certainly would
She said Will you join me, At cooking I'm good
He said my fair Lady, I most certainly would
She stood with English breakfast, Ready on a plate
The vision was just wonderful, The smell was just great
She joined him on the bed, And they ate most heartily
How wonderful he thought, On this morn alive to be
(breaking music, this bit sang soulfully)
He turned to her with wonder
And then he said
Have I gone to heaven
Am I really dead
Out of all the men in the world
Why have you chose I
She said I don't know
YOU JUST CAUGHT MY EYE
Any advice appreciated, Tremulous Tetra. :-)