2 Police officers talking.
POLICE1
Why did he do it, why did poor Old Michael Todd kill himself?
POLICE2
He left a not saying it was suicide.
POLICE1
So?
POLICE2
He always wanted to solve at least one murder in his career.
Todd
Soots shouldn't that read
'he wanted to solve at least one crime'
and even then only if you're Catholic. Suicide isn't um..murder by definition. Or am I missing something?
Actually it is according to statute. But I suspect this wasn't one of my finer efforts.
Suicide ain't a crime 
I sort of thought it didn't make sense. Hows about
'Did he leave a suicide note?'
'No but he did do the paperwork'
Quote: ajp29 @ March 12, 2008, 12:08 AMSuicide ain't a crime
I sort of thought it didn't make sense. Hows about
'Did he leave a suicide note?'
'No but he did do the paperwork'
or
Yes, he was was always keen on the paper work.
"Did he leave a suicide note?"
"Yes."
"Well, round up the usual Gangbangers any way, maybe we can pin it on one of them."
What did the note say?
The note can't say anything, it's just a sheet of paper.
Did he leave a suicide not?
Yeah, it reads 'Was killed by a black man'
I think you could get the American term 'Suicide by Cop' into this one somewhere. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_by_cop
I thought suicide was technically still against the law or am I thinking back about 200 years ago?
Quote: Paul W @ March 12, 2008, 7:41 PMI thought suicide was technically still against the law or am I thinking back about 200 years ago?
Enforcement might be difficult. Stiff sentences for those involved 
In the 18th century unsuccessful suicides, were executed for attempted murder.
Quote: sootyj @ March 12, 2008, 8:31 PMIn the 18th century unsuccessful suicides, were executed for attempted murder.
I like you
Wonder if you had committed a murder in the 18th century and after feeling remorse you attempted suicide but failed. What suitable punishment would you have got? Surely execution would not have been enough.
Hanging was known as a "Monster's Ball,"
The sad sack, got a feast the night before, and some fun with a prostitute. Then they would walk a mile or so to Tyburn to be hung. Along the way crowds would cheer him on, women would kiss him, and pubs enroute would hand him pints of beer. By the time they hung him, it must have been a relief, after a rather jolly day.
This worked.