I read the news today oh boy! Page 2,070

Steve Coogan already had 9 points on his driving licence when he turned up in court this morning charged with speeding.

He pleaded guilty but said that the six-month driving ban that 12 points would normally attract would force him to cancel an Alan Partridge travelogue program that he is due to make with the BBC later this year.

The magistrates took a sympathetic view and banned him for just 2 months.

Wouldn't it have been great if the magistrate had preceded his judgement by announcing that it had been "ah-haaaard" decision?

Quote: Rood Eye @ 13th August 2019, 12:03 PM

Steve Coogan already had 9 points on his driving licence when he turned up in court this morning charged with speeding.

He pleaded guilty but said that the six-month driving ban that 12 points would normally attract would force him to cancel an Alan Partridge travelogue program that he is due to make with the BBC later this year.

The magistrates took a sympathetic view and banned him for just 2 months.

Wouldn't it have been great if the magistrate had preceded his judgement by announcing that it had been "ah-haaaard" decision?

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Wouldn't it have been greater, both for the sanity of the viewing public and for the safety of all road users, if they had just given him the six month ban that the offence warranted?

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 13th August 2019, 3:01 PM

Wouldn't it have been greater, both for the sanity of the viewing public and for the safety of all road users, if they had just given him the six month ban that the offence warranted?

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Agreed! He can afford a chauffeur.

Apparently white people don't eat Fried Chicken.

https://www.politicshome.com/news/uk/political-parties/labour-party/news/105924/labours-diane-abbott-tears-home-office-over-crude

I knew David Lammy would chip in with being offended. (What next he says ' warnings on water melons)
Before I read that article it never crossed my mind it could be seen as racist - and it isn't.
They just put it in your mind that it is.

Having done a bit of research on KFC's target market in the light of Diane Abbott's recent complaint, I can sum up that market in one word - "everybody".

I'm not sure Diane Abbott is cut out (no pun intended) to be Home Secretary. Surely she realises that if she wants to get anti-knife messages to those most likely to go around stabbing people, the best product upon which to place those messages would be . . . knives!

Trump?. Greenland? Is he insane or just an arse? Yes to both.

If he did it buy it,it wouldn't be called Greenland for long.Trumpland with the capital of Trumpton.

Cheryl Cole has come in for a bit of stick over the years, not least from Katherine Ryan who says she's done more damage to the north-east than Margaret Thatcher.

Be that as it may, Cheryl's popularity is certainly on the wane at Madame Tussauds: her wax effigy has been removed because bosses believe she "may no longer be relevant".

Still, she's only 36 and she's made a few quid in her time so I'm sure life still has a lot to offer her.

Are ya.

There's nowt on yer hook,

Ruby Wax was due to perform at the Edinburgh fringe next week (as she has done for the past 30 years or more) but she won't be there: she's fallen off her horse!

Her injuries are reportedly quite serious: that makes sense because if they were not, there can be little doubt a trooper like Ruby would have jumped up and climbed right back on again!

Let us all wish her a speedy recovery and a swift return to the world of comedy performance.

Quote: Briosaid @ 16th August 2019, 8:57 PM

Trump?. Greenland? Is he insane or just an arse? Yes to both.

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He possibly thinks it is green and will make a good golf course.

What are the chances that Michel Barnier at al, know exactly how to say 'F**k off, Boris' in English?

?

Quote: Rood Eye @ 17th August 2019, 11:48 AM

Cheryl's popularity is certainly on the wane at Madame Tussauds: her wax effigy has been removed because bosses believe she "may no longer be relevant".

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Who has she she been melted down to make?

Quote: Briosaid @ 18th August 2019, 8:27 PM

What are the chances that Michel Barnier at al, know exactly how to say 'F**k off, Boris' in English?

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Who gives a toss? We're leaving on October 31st.