British Comedy Guide
Please donate to help support British comedy at all levels. Thank you. Find out more

Status report Page 6,044

Cashless locations are being criticized here for discriminating against the homeless. I wouldn't be surprised if that's why they went cashless in the first place.

Quote: john tregorran @ 17th June 2019, 10:05 PM

There was a woman waving a ring about at the check out the other day.Apparently magically it paid her bill.(And perhaps everyone else's in the queue.)

Are you sure she wasn't just twerking.

Quote: DaButt @ 17th June 2019, 11:57 PM

Cashless locations are being criticized here for discriminating against the homeless. I wouldn't be surprised if that's why they went cashless in the first place.

I was approached on 5 occasions in Brighton last night by 5 different people asking for money (one wanted a specific £6). I wondered then what they would do in a cashless society.

Quote: Definitely Tarby @ 16th June 2019, 10:29 PM

A quick once over of the wiki page for the mayor duties in the British Isles is mostly of ceremonial and other related duties and not linked to policing.

.

I think you're maybe confusing the Mayor of London (Khan) with the Lord Mayor of London (No idea).

Quote: Chappers @ 18th June 2019, 10:37 PM

Lord Mayor of London (No idea).

The name that immediately springs to mind is "Dick Whittington": I certainly can't think of a more recent one.

Lord Mayor of London, Incumbent Peter Estlin since 9 November 2018

Got a card at work today and there were rumours I had a secret admirer. I was hoping the same but it's just a 5 years service thank-you card.

Yesterday was the longest day - it's all down-hill from here to long dark cold nights of doom & gloom.

Just thought I'd spread a bit of cheer.

Thank you Mr Despond. Are you feeling bilious again?

Sick Yes, the NYMR finished last night. :(

Quote: Definitely Tarby @ 20th June 2019, 2:25 PM

Got a card at work today and there were rumours I had a secret admirer. I was hoping the same but it's just a 5 years service thank-you card.

5 year service? Is that supposed to be an achievement?

At least they recognised it and in this day of pimp employment agencies and gangmasters it could end up being a f**king record soon .

Ooh, I've just thought. I have been working for me sen for 25 years... ad better get off tu't jewelers and get mi sen a gold clock.

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 27th June 2019, 7:52 AM

Ooh, I've just thought. I have been working for me sen for 25 years... ad better get off tu't jewelers and get mi sen a gold clock.

That reminds me of the joke I heard on YouTube when I was looking up Dave Evans (Lee Evan's dad) who died recently - he tells the joke very well, but whoever posted the vid., the twat cut the punch line off, but you know what it is.

Only a short vid. but for the joke watch from about 2.05

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjL5pXCCk00

My son-in-law is in his first week as a sheriff's deputy in Denver, but he's already making headlines. A 4-foot snake made its way into someone's house and he was tasked with catching it. He cited the late Steve Irwin as his inspiration. :)

Share this page