Wanted - technology gags for a new comedy podcast (paid)

Fancy writing some gags for a brand new comedy podcast?

'Why did the Chicken?' are currently producing a 6-part scripted comedy podcast satirising modern technology and celebrating the 'makers' from history who made it all possible.

'History Makers' stars Head of the Guild of Makers and Robot Wars judge Lucy Rogers alongside comediennes Bec Hill and Harriet Braine and is being written/produced by some of the team behind the award-winning Damn the Torpedoes.

We're accepting open submissions for gags to be featured at the end of the show in the form of 'listener messages' or 'audience questions' e.g.

"Dale from Doncaster has texted in to say "I smashed my so-called wireless modem with a hammer and there were wires inside, what's going on?" (SARCASTICALLY) You're right Dale, it's all a lie."

"Q. Sarah in the third rows asks "In an increasingly tech conscious world, am I better off learning Python or Java?"
"A. Well Sarah, given that all software code is just an imperfect metaphorical construct written through the distorted lens of human consciousness and trying to tame the underlying nature of reality in an imperfect Universe then...I'd go with Fortran."

"And another email from Dr Eve. L G'Neeus which simply reads - 'Over twenty years ago, we were promised sharks with laser beams on their heads. (BEAT) Where are they?'"

We're specifically looking for jokes that (loosely) fit with the following themes:

Wireless Comms (think Bluetooth, Wi-fi, NFC, Cellphones...)
Computer Programming (think Computers, Apps, Coding...)
Artificial Intelligence (think voice control, chatbots, natural language processing, machine learning, robots...)
3D Manufacturing (think layer deposition, 3D printers, industrial lasers...)
Location and Navigation (think CCTV, GPS, tracking, maps, satnav, clocks...)
Cyber (think encryption, blockchain, virtual currency, hacking, viruses, dark web...)

If you're interested then please send your material to scripts@whydidthechicken.com by July 8th using the Subject line 'History Makers Gags' and we'll pay £10 for each gag that makes it to the final edit.

Thanks!
--
Dan Page
Chief Egg @ Why did the Chicken? www.whydidthechicken.com

This has to be worth a punt I'll have a go mate thanks for the offer .

Would this type work?
I would like to ask the panel if they think that the cost of 'Continuous Liquid Interface Production' is just sales- tech talk for 'Taking The piss'?

Hi Teddy, I should have said - it's going to be recorded before a live audience, so if it needs too much thinking about then chances are it won't get a laugh. So in your example I'm not sure if the setup is a recognisable 'thing'?

Certainly heading in the right direction though, so keep going!

Sound it was more to give me a feel I'll do some tonight .

Why do I keep name-checking M C Escher? I'm going for a lie sideways.

Thanks to all those who sent in gags - we'll get back to you just before the show goes out to let you know how you got on.

Cheers!

Hi all,

Just a quick follow-up to say the show is shaping up really nicely and several gags from the open submissions have made the rehearsal scripts.

If anyone wants a (free) ticket for the Episode 1 & 2 recording this coming Sunday (15th), then please get in touch via scripts@whydidthechicken.com ASAP stating how many you'd like.

The venue is the Canal Cafe in Little Venice, London and guests should arrive around 1-1.30pm for 2pm (ish) start. Recording time will be 1 hour, so we'll be done before the football starts!

Cheers,
--
Dan Page

Is the podcast available yet? If not any idea when it will be?

Hi all,

The podcast is currently being edited and reviewed and Episode 1 is due for release in September.

Once all the episode have been signed off I'll be contacting writers whose gags made it into the show (and, if I have time, the writers whose gags made it to the shortlist but weren't selected for the final show).

Thanks again to everyone who submitted!

Cool!

Got the nice e-mail for this.First in 5 and a half years.The shows are available on Podbean and ITunes from 3rd September.

Hi,

All those who submitted gags should now have been contacted. Congrats to everyone who got something in or came close and kudos to everyone who submitted.

The show is now LIVE via Podbean at www.designspark.podbean.com or iTunes (search for DesignSpark or History Makers). Please do take a listen and if you like what you hear leave us a lovely rating.

Thankyou for helping make this all possible.

Didn't get anything in the final edit, but two jokes in the final script. And as I say when only half my students turn up, I'm a class half-full kinda guy.
Great stuff.

Good that all three of the performers are, if you'll pardon the expression , women .Makes a blooming change.