British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 1,984

Quote: Bill Poster @ 2nd May 2018, 5:05 AM

It will be all right if I keep moving.

That was my mistake. I was transfixed by the $1 three-packs of DVD covers in the Useless Tat aisle, when a woman mistook me for a damaged garden gnome. She paid $3 for me and put me in her front garden, alongside some ceramic rabbits. It's not a bad life.

I think some resignations are coming...

Donald Trump the arsehole yet again. The number of folk you can take down with a knife bears no comparison to the number that can be taken down by a gun. Then again, he's probably too thick to count.

Well, someone tweeted that Trump's mental strength and stamina are extraordinary.Making him the best President ever in the history of the world.
Don't know who it was though...?

Quote: Briosaid @ 4th May 2018, 10:23 PM

Donald Trump the arsehole yet again. The number of folk you can take down with a knife bears no comparison to the number that can be taken down by a gun. Then again, he's probably too thick to count.

Maybe a machine gun, but these aren't legal in the US. Even recent history proves that is completely wrong related to the average handgun or even a single semi auto rifle. Remember that nutter in Vegas who slaughtered dozens had about eight preloaded rifles to do the job and a perfect vantage point.

The Rwanda genocide of over a million was carried out with knives. As have more distant genocides been by knives and swords and general blades. They are a highly lethal weapon against the unprotected. Several murdered in minutes near London Bridge by four nutters with knives. There's hardly a soldier in the whole world who isn't issued with a military combat knife and trained how to kill with it. Even our SAS have carried out highly successful Taliban and IS filled cave clearances armed only with knives as weapons aided with night vision helmets when firing bullets would have killed them as well. The comparison of carnage they do in reality is very close.

Quote: Paul Wimsett @ 24th April 2018, 8:48 AM

And yet the Royals refuse to screen it!

Ha ha. I think a Corbyn Govnt. would force them to screen it and the cameras would be waiting to zoom in on the silver spoon in its little gob as it enters its lovely world.

Quote: Frankie Mildly Perturbed @ 23rd April 2018, 3:51 PM

I note that Emily Thornberry, Shadow Foreign Secretary, is in the press today and it is reported that she is 'sickened', 'fed up' and that people have come up to her and spoken to her 'in the most appalling terms' with respect to anti-semitism / anti-semitic remarks and she is concerned over the failure of the Labour Party to root it out.

What actually are these anti-semitic remarks.. she doesn't actually say..

I have noticed this in a few articles on this topic.

What specific remarks are of concern?

You Zionist bitch and other remarks very clumsily and faciley replacing the word Jew or Jewish with Zionist thinking it will absolve them of any accusation of racism! All this from Labour party members who have remodelled the party as a leftist anti racist party. WTF isn't racist about anti Semitism then? And in case some don't believe the hatred I've been back up in North London lately and seen security guards manning the gates of Jewish primary schools FFS.

Quote: Alfred J Kipper @ 5th May 2018, 8:44 PM

Maybe a machine gun, but these aren't legal in the US. Even recent history proves that is completely wrong related to the average handgun or even a single semi auto rifle. Remember that nutter in Vegas who slaughtered dozens had about eight preloaded rifles to do the job and a perfect vantage point.

The Rwanda genocide of over a million was carried out with knives. As have more distant genocides been by knives and swords and general blades. They are a highly lethal weapon against the unprotected. Several murdered in minutes near London Bridge by four nutters with knives. There's hardly a soldier in the whole world who isn't issued with a military combat knife and trained how to kill with it. Even our SAS have carried out highly successful Taliban and IS filled cave clearances armed only with knives as weapons aided with night vision helmets when firing bullets would have killed them as well. The comparison of carnage they do in reality is very close.

Ha ha. I think a Corbyn Govnt. would force them to screen it and the cameras would be waiting to zoom in on the silver spoon in its little gob as it enters its lovely world.

Come on, Alfred. You can't really be suggesting knives have done as much damage as all the gun-toting numpties who've mown down scores of young students in the US. REALLY?

Quote: Briosaid @ 5th May 2018, 8:58 PM

Come on, Alfred. You can't really be suggesting knives have done as much damage as all the gun-toting numpties who've mown down scores of young students in the US. REALLY?

About 250 people have been killed in school shootings in the United States since the year 2000. In that time, more than 25,000 people have been killed by knives in the United States.

And over half a million gun deaths in that time

Quote: DaButt @ 5th May 2018, 9:15 PM

About 250 people have been killed in school shootings in the United States since the year 2000. In that time, more than 25,000 people have been killed by knives in the United States.

Just 250 in 18 years? Aye right. You're conveniently mixing one bunch of figures (which are debatable) with the total number of knife deaths for the whole of the US.

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 5th May 2018, 10:32 PM

And over half a million gun deaths in that time

Please note, Da Butt (if you can stop cleaning your guns for long enough)

And thick, evil Trump knows so much better than the highly intelligent, highly qualified, highly experienced British doctors.

Quote: Briosaid @ 4th May 2018, 10:23 PM

Donald Trump the arsehole yet again. Then again, he's probably too thick to count.

He may well be an arsehole, but he surely ain't thick. To become President of the US you almost certainly have to be an arsehole, I expect all his predecessors were too (it would go with the territory), but neither he nor any of them are/were thick.

There ain't too many thick multi-millionaire business men either, but it may comfort poor folk to think that they maybe thick!

'Thick' usually refers to low-intelligence and thus low-earners, or the intelligent poor who've f**ked up their lives. I am certainly in one of these two categories! Your kindness will place me in the second of these, no doubt! :)

As for yanks and guns, I've never had a problem with them shooting each other, let 'em get on with it. With 7.5 billion people on the planet if we lose a few to 'lead poisoning' it ain't gonna be the end of the human race..

Some people seemed to hate Obama and plenty seem to hate Trump.. but neither of them has been shot yet.. mmm.. I wonder why not? Errr

Quote: Briosaid @ 5th May 2018, 8:58 PM

Come on, Alfred. You can't really be suggesting knives have done as much damage as all the gun-toting numpties who've mown down scores of young students in the US. REALLY?

Your assertion is invalid because you're not looking at the big picture. McDonald's sells about 150,000 Big Macs per day in Scotland, whereas Argentinians consume 40 liters of Fanta per capita annually. Compare that to Australia, where death by shark attacks is just one per year, while the figure is five times higher in Chad (which has not yet banned sharks). Now consider that Rwandan machetes are an average length of 45cm, and the average American bra size is 34DD. You don't get to be this smart without a big inheritance and shagging porn stars. Anyone who disagrees with me should read my best-selling book Mensa for Morons.

Quote: Alfred J Kipper @ 5th May 2018, 8:44 PM

Remember that nutter in Vegas who slaughtered dozens had about eight preloaded rifles to do the job and a perfect vantage point.

He actually had 23 rifles in his hotel room and fired thousands of rounds into a crowded concert, yet he only managed to kill 58 people. The terrorist in France killed 86 people with a truck.

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 5th May 2018, 10:32 PM

And over half a million gun deaths in that time

And about 400,000 of them were suicides. Suicides have no place in discussions of gun crimes and gun control.

Quote: Briosaid @ 5th May 2018, 11:04 PM

Just 250 in 18 years? Aye right.

Yes, that's the correct number.

Quote: Briosaid @ 5th May 2018, 11:04 PM

You're conveniently mixing one bunch of figures (which are debatable) with the total number of knife deaths for the whole of the US.

No, I'm responding to your post of "You can't really be suggesting knives have done as much damage as all the gun-toting numpties who've mown down scores of young students in the US." by showing that far more people are murdered by knives than are killed in school shootings.

Quote: Briosaid @ 5th May 2018, 11:04 PM

Please note, Da Butt (if you can stop cleaning your guns for long enough)

I haven't laid eyes on any of my firearms since my visit to the range in June of last year. I need to schedule another session!

Quote: DaButt @ 6th May 2018, 2:57 PM

He actually had 23 rifles in his hotel room and fired thousands of rounds into a crowded concert, yet he only managed to kill 58 people. The terrorist in France killed 86 people with a truck.

I didn't know there was a competition.

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