British Comedy Guide

Things That Have Never Been in the Lyrics of a Top 40 Record

Giraffe
Fitting a carpet
Scrabble
Boris Johnson
Runner beans
Toenails
The Shard
Water lilies
Venezuela
Lacrosse

A Horseradish

Combine harvesters...d'oh!!!

Tax adviser

Scabies (AFAIK)

Quote: A Horseradish @ 1st February 2018, 10:59 PM

Water lilies

"I say, I say, I say, my dustbin's full of lilies..."

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 1st February 2018, 11:52 PM

"I say, I say, I say, my dustbin's full of lilies..."

Nice one

Quote: A Horseradish @ 1st February 2018, 10:59 PM

Runner beans

Near enough :-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3meEmDpaDU

Some very good tries here.

Just what I wanted.

Combine harvesters - The Wurzels and Melanie.

Lilies - My Old Man's a Dustman but not water lilies.

Running Bear - Not near enough - try forking that off your plate.

The Hooded Claw.
Play For Today
Klingons on bows

Okay, these were all in songs.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 2nd February 2018, 12:19 PM

Combine harvesters - The Wurzels and Melanie.

Eh Errrrr........... Not Melanie. Tut Tut

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 2nd February 2018, 3:06 PM

Eh Errrrr........... Not Melanie. Tut Tut

Oh alright then.

You will only prove yourself to be very clever if you can find the songs to which the previous poster refers.

I haven't got a clue on any of them but would probably try Genesis as an answer to all three.

Peter Gabriel era.

Lyrics.com is a good place to cheat. Can't find a top 40 hit with the word "Scrabble" in it.

Gullibilty?

Crippling stomach cramps that lead to urgent and frequent trips to the toilet throughout the night to defecate.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 1st February 2018, 10:59 PM

The Shard

If you leave me now, you'll take away the biggest part of me
Oh no baby please don't go
If you leave me now, you'll take away the very heart of me
Oh no baby please don't go
Girl I just want you to stay

A love like ours is love that'SHARD to find
How could we let it slip away
We've come too far to leave it all behind

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 2nd February 2018, 8:28 PM

If you leave me now, you'll take away the biggest part of me
Oh no baby please don't go
If you leave me now, you'll take away the very heart of me
Oh no baby please don't go
Girl I just want you to stay

A love like ours is love that'SHARD to find
How could we let it slip away
We've come too far to leave it all behind

I can hear that in my head. Didn't the singers come from somewhere like Largs (have any of you ever heard of it?)?

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