More Newsjack rejects from the last couple of weeks. I thought some of these were quite good (but apparently not). Any comments/suggestions/feedback would be appreciated - thanks!
ONELINERS
Sport. India dominated Bangladesh in the test cricket this week. We ask - if they're so good, how come they've never won The Ashes?
Nerds are angry that the next Doctor Who might be female - having the last two Star Wars films led by women drove them crazy, but this latest news has got them absolutely Rey-Jyn mad
Investors hope to buy Snapchat for 25 billion dollars - they're very excited about the company's prospects and can't wait to tell everyone about it on their MySpace profile and Friends Reunited page
"The Walking Dead" is back on TV this week and, despite complaints, the production team refuse to tone down the show's violence. If they can't see that Negan's scenes with Lucille are totally unacceptable then someone will just have to beat it into their thick skulls.
NUMBER CRUNCHERS
One and a half million - the number of websites that have been hacked and defaced this week due to poor security - zero - the number of hacks that got through the impenetrable NewsJack knob firewall boobs
One - The number of times Facebook asked users to help with its rebranding - One million - the number of people who suggested "Facebook McFacebookFace"
One billion dollars - the amount of money that Ford is going to invest in developing artificial intelligence for their state of the art self-driving cars - Twenty quid - what it costs to hire Brian and his Ford Transit down the Red Lion
1 - the number of zoos found to be cruelly neglecting their animals this week. 4 - the number of hungry hungry hippos.