Quote: beaky @ 14th September 2016, 2:02 PM. Nogget gets a round of applause.
(Didn't know how to do the bullet point)
•Me neither, so I cut and pasted it. Here you go, have these for free••••••••••
Maybe someone will tell us how it should be done, so we know how to do them next time we avoid using bulletpoint beats.
Quote: Nogget @ 14th September 2016, 2:01 PMAlthough I should say I never use them (which is why I asked the question in the first place), so I might be getting it wrong.
They're not something you 'use'.
They just automatically turn up when you write a story - you don't have a choice.
It's spotting them that's tricky
It's like most terminology - the main reason you need to have a working knowledge is when someone else starts hurling them around in a meeting.
Quote: Lazzard @ 14th September 2016, 2:37 PMThey're not something you 'use'.
They just automatically turn up when you write a story - you don't have a choice.
I see that, although I have been asked to show them, bulletpointed, by a producer, to give him the gist of my proposed sketches; so when I said using the beats, I meant using the system of showing the beats. Sorry for the confusion.
I'd never worked like that before*, which is why I asked here what others do.
*Not in such a systematic way, anyway.
Quote: Lazzard @ 14th September 2016, 2:37 PMThey're not something you 'use'.
They just automatically turn up when you write a story - you don't have a choice.
It's spotting them that's tricky
It's like most terminology - the main reason you need to have a working knowledge is when someone else starts hurling them around in a meeting.
Being unaware of the labels (terminologies) for writing styles and rhetorical devices has been a joke since at least 1670, when Molière wrote The Middle Class Gentleman:
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Is it verse that you wish to write her?
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: No, no. No verse.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Do you want only prose?
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: No, I don't want either prose or verse.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: It must be one or the other.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Why?
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Because, sir, there is no other way to express oneself than with prose or verse.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: There is nothing but prose or verse?
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: No, sir, everything that is not prose is verse, and everything that is not verse is prose.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: And when one speaks, what is that then?
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Prose.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: What! When I say, "Nicole, bring me my slippers, and give me my nightcap," that's prose?
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Yes, Sir.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: By my faith! For more than forty years I have been speaking prose without knowing anything about it, and I am much obliged to you for having taught me that. I would like then to put into a note to her: "Beautiful marchioness, your lovely eyes make me die of love," but I want that put in a gallant manner and be nicely turned.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Put it that the fires of her eyes reduce your heart to cinders; that you suffer night and day for her the torments of a . . .
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: No, no, no. I want none of that; I only want you to say "Beautiful marchioness, your lovely eyes make me die of love."
Quote: Nogget @ 15th September 2016, 4:41 AMI see that, although I have been asked to show them, bulletpointed, by a producer, to give him the gist of my proposed sketches; so when I said using the beats, I meant using the system of showing the beats. Sorry for the confusion.
I'd never worked like that before*, which is why I asked here what others do.
*Not in such a systematic way, anyway.
Understood.
Though I can imagine the beat sheet for a sketch might end up slightly longer than the sketch.
Could he not just, you know, read them?
Quote: Lazzard @ 15th September 2016, 3:56 PMUnderstood.
Though I can imagine the beat sheet for a sketch might end up slightly longer than the sketch.
Could he not just, you know, read them?
Seems crazy. Most sketches have a single premise, so the plot beats would be barely existent
-One-legged man suggests himself as Tarzan actor to industry professional
-They disagree
or
-Customer tells sales assistant that the parrot he bought was dead
-They disagree
-Crap bit about palindromes that everyone will forget 
There's certainly some beats here.
I don't know if this thread is dead.
I wrote a comedy Mahjong Pizza that was just about interesting enough to be discussed on Sitcom Geeks
http://sitcomgeek.blogspot.com/p/first-ten-pages.html
I could talk you through how I did the beats for that, if you're interested. Pretty simple because it's a pretty basic sitcom - like the third full script I wrote or something.
It's better if you post on showcase or review, Lawrence.
Quote: Lawrence Diamond @ 29th October 2016, 12:59 PMI could talk you through how I did the beats for that, if you're interested.
Yes please, I'd like to see that. So you actually wrote it out embryonically using beats before drafting it?
Right, embryonic. Like the chicken and the egg. Who's on first? That's up to you. Sorry if I'm being a bit esoteric. I've had accounts banned before and if I actually give specific answer to specific questions I may be banned again for your own safety. I think of rough ideas for As and Bs. Then start to think of the major beats that are needed. Maybe four or five. Then I look at which A might go with which B. Once you've got that, you know which direction you're heading in. It's all a matter of painting yourself into a corner and at this point I think you know where your corner is. Then I expand them a little bit. Little Jack Horner working hard. About 8 for the A, about 5 or 6 for the B. Then I think WHERE and WHO are needed, which is very important. So I have little scraps of paper with the beats on them and WHERE in the top right corner and WHO in the bottom left corner (very important that). Then I lay them out on the floor (watch the paint). Then I move them around like a Carnie doing the old ball and cup routine. I do the old old switcheroo a couple of times. It's a bit like a dance. Chantilly lace and a pretty face and I hope I'm not losing you here. Then I realise that this doesn't work. The WHERE and THE WHO. That's what matters. The Kids Are Alright but what about the logistics? You cannot have one person in two places at one time! Not unless he has a mobile phone to call someone in which case you can. So that pretty much sorts itself out and that's why it's called an OUTline. It takes a while. Late nights and unanswered phonecalls. But now you've broken the story, and a few hearts along the way. Then you just write the dialogue. You can write dialogue can't you? Just follow the rules you've worked out. Not so much rules, I suppose, more like guidelines, but you need to stick to them. There's the rub. And be flexible. Then it needs a punch up. Always be punching up, that's how you bring down the Man. It's fun anyway, so knock yourself out. After that you need an agent. An agent is someone who can give you good advice, such as not wasting money on an agent. Then you have a pitch meeting. You all pitch in until you realise you no longer have a half-hour sitcom about a group of website designers, you have a 65-page eBook on basketweaving. For some reason this has to take place in an elevator. That's just an American term for a lift. Do you need one? I'm about to catch a taxi myself.
Groucho lives!
It's better if you post in short dismissive comments or dead jew namechecks, beaky.
Quote: Lawrence Diamond @ 22nd November 2016, 5:05 AMI think of rough ideas for As and Bs.
Are you talking about plots and subplots?
Right. As and Bs. That's what I said.
So, in Doggy Day afternoon, the A is that Ola has to write an article for a women's magazine about the BLATANT SEXISM that women in China face. You've seen the Guardian, right? As long as your article suggests women are oppressed they will publish literally anything. But Persephone, her corner-cutting Chinese business partner, isn't playing ball. She thinks men ARE better as business. So, in order to PROVE A POINT (always a mistake) Ola agrees to Ollie's idea of a happy hour - with hilarious consequences! So, it's on-concept - a group of foreigners running a pizza restaurant in Beijing. It has conflict between two central characters - Ola trying to prove a point about sexism, Perseffie being Chinese, just letting it happen and getting what she wants in the end. And... something else. I can't remember. Probably I wanted a musical number in there and those Peek at the Knees dogs (that's a Groucho reference for the schnozz-meister two posts up) are representative of Beijing I feel.
The B is that Kurt stars as a "token white guy" in a Chinese advert for children's underwear. That's kind of about his self-esteem. He actually starts to feel good about himself, but then we see the finished advert and in fact he looks a twat.
So that's about being a white guy in China, Kurt's self esteem issues that are in no way reflective of my own mental state or personal journey, and having a funny video in there for a nice production feature.
And the connection between the two, the THEMATIC LINK is Persephone's goofy Pekingese dog New New. New New has sensitive skin so Kurt puts him in the special underpants he got from the advert. But Nathan, the token sitcom homosexual, picks up his scissors to create doggy split pants. the dogs end up running riot at Ollie's happy hour, Ola has to admit she was wrong. Seffie gets what she wants, New New gets his pizza. We're pretty much back to where we started. Theme tune, closing credits.
Oh, I should add that James Cary and David Cohen thought my script was shite!
So, bear that in mind before following in my footsteps.