Status report Page 5,778

Quote: Lee @ 11th April 2015, 2:01 PM BST

I think I scratched my eyelid somehow? Because it only hurts when I look or blink in a certain way. Either way, it bloody annoying!

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Bathe it gently every few hours with some warm water and salt, about one pinch of salt to a small saucer of water. Boil the water first to dissolve the salt then let it cool to bearable temperature.

Later/when you go to bed, put a clean cold flannel over it or a slice of cucumber.

If it's not ok tomorrow get someone to check it.

Loopey health report:

Thank you for all the good wishes. I was seen by a very nice Consultant. My dislocated jaw is now almost back where it should be but still unstable due to stretched ligaments and sore muscles so could dislocate again. I'm allowed pureed food and liquids until I go back in a week when I might start physio.

Meanwhile I'm to treat it with anti inflam gel, painkillers, and a scarf tied round my face Highwayman style. If anyone wants to stand and deliver I'll have a stagecoach full of chocolate please.

I definitely won't be biting anyone for a while.

Hope you are all having a great time at the drinks do.

Quote: zooo @ 11th April 2015, 4:24 PM BST

Was it a girl masseuse or a boy one? I'm never sure which would be less awkward.

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It was a girl. I'd rather a female than a male. It's just more fun that way.

Quote: Loopey @ 11th April 2015, 6:57 PM BST

Loopey health report:

Thank you for all the good wishes. I was seen by a very nice Consultant. My dislocated jaw is now almost back where it should be but still unstable due to stretched ligaments and sore muscles so could dislocate again. I'm allowed pureed food and liquids until I go back in a week when I might start physio.

Meanwhile I'm to treat it with anti inflam gel, painkillers, and a scarf tied round my face Highwayman style. If anyone wants to stand and deliver I'll have a stagecoach full of chocolate please.

I definitely won't be biting anyone for a while.

Hope you are all having a great time at the drinks do.

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Oh dear Loopey, hope you recover quickly.

Loopey will soon be kicking our arses again.

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 11th April 2015, 7:38 PM BST

Oh dear Loopey, hope you recover quickly.

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Thank you.

Quote: Gordon Bennett @ 11th April 2015, 8:01 PM BST

Loopey will soon be kicking our arses again.

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Hell yeah!

Quote: Ben @ 11th April 2015, 7:29 PM BST

It was a girl. I'd rather a female than a male. It's just more fun that way.

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Hmm, define 'fun.'

A boy masseuse would be a contradiction in terms!

Oh, would he be Monsieur masseur?

I am currently having deep tissue massage twice a week on the entirety of my back half. What I am finding is that on the journey home I'm feeling very square in build and three dimensional rather than lop-sided as is my way. He reckons that my feet need to be sorted for it to have any permanent effect. I am not so sure. The problem, I think, is that it would work reasonably well in the longer term if I was to lose the ability to write and decided to go about the world from now on in a totally brainless way. But once I get onto a computer or take out pen and paper, it all becomes very forward leaning again and stooping which is not great for the spine. So it is all now becoming a bit of a dilemma.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 11th April 2015, 11:19 PM BST

I am currently having deep tissue massage twice a week on the entirety of my back half. What I am finding is that on the journey home I'm feeling very square in build and three dimensional rather than lop-sided as is my way. He reckons that my feet need to be sorted for it to have any permanent effect. I am not so sure. The problem, I think, is that it would work reasonably well in the longer term if I was to lose the ability to write and decided to go about the world from now on in a totally brainless way. But once I get onto a computer or take out pen and paper, it all becomes very forward leaning again and stooping which is not great for the spine. So it is all now becoming a bit of a dilemma.

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Why, surely that's what bolt guns were invented for. No?
Sorry to hear about your bad back.
Very much in same boat there.

Quote: Gussie Fink Nottle @ 12th April 2015, 12:36 AM BST

Why, surely that's what bolt guns were invented for. No?
Sorry to hear about your bad back.
Very much in same boat there.

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Thanks GFN. For me, it is front problems - chest - that are now being addressed from the back or so I like to tell myself. I am historically anxiety prone and that has frequently become muscular-skeletal.

Not so long ago I walked the Jurassic coast path. Now my life is more emphatically thoracic. I could write a book - or sitcom? - about the place I am visiting. It is a whole world of its own in there with a range of characters passing through. Many are considerably more interesting than most on television.

The main man is an ex boxer with a PHD and leanings towards punk rock and threesomes. There is a lot of effing and blinding but it is much less frosty than I find with any standard medical bureaucracy. The funny thing is it happened by chance. I didn't know before I made enquiries it was even there.

Well, I too go for massage. Albeit much more rarely.
My problems stem from a series of doctors being too busy telling me not to worry about my back pain to actually investigate what might be causing it.

I therefore wandered through life for fifteen years or more with a bad back when a simple measuring tape might have told our dear medical experts that one of my legs was considerably shorter than the other.

The irony was that on the day a medicus finally discovered what was plaguing me he utter the immortal line, 'You know, some of those symptoms you've described in the past now make a lot of sense.'

I guess I can feel pride not to have dispatched him to his maker right there and then.

The place I visit for massage I am afraid is much more mundane. No ex boxers or talk of threesomes. Only a tiny woman with lots of diplomas and thumbs which can drill through concrete.

My friend/neighbor is a neurosurgeon and he's been having some neck pain. Yesterday he had a deep tissue massage and he said that it had helped greatly. I was skeptical, but I'll take his professional opinion at face value.

I have a massage once a week, twice sometimes.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 11th April 2015, 11:19 PM BST

I am currently having deep tissue massage twice a week on the entirety of my back half. What I am finding is that on the journey home I'm feeling very square in build and three dimensional rather than lop-sided as is my way. He reckons that my feet need to be sorted for it to have any permanent effect. I am not so sure. The problem, I think, is that it would work reasonably well in the longer term if I was to lose the ability to write and decided to go about the world from now on in a totally brainless way. But once I get onto a computer or take out pen and paper, it all becomes very forward leaning again and stooping which is not great for the spine. So it is all now becoming a bit of a dilemma.

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You may know all this but it's helped lots of people I know so worth mentioning - do you do pilates, yoga or Alexander technique? That can help build your core and improve your stamina and stability. It can certainly make life more comfortable for those who slave over a hot pc. Make sure your chair is supportive and right height for level of pc. Taking a regular break from sitting and having a stretch, gently shaking your limbs and walking about for a few minutes can help too. Think about your breathing as well as your position when sitting n a chair - it's easy to start taking small shallow breaths if your body is hunched or squashed.

Thanks for the iAdvice Loops. My eye is better today, just a bit swallon around the lid, probably from all the crying watering it did yesterday. Glad you're feeling a bit better. Back to the tea dances soon?

Quote: Loopey @ 12th April 2015, 7:50 AM BST

I have a massage once a week, twice sometimes.

You may know all this but it's helped lots of people I know so worth mentioning - do you do pilates, yoga or Alexander technique? That can help build your core and improve your stamina and stability. It can certainly make life more comfortable for those who slave over a hot pc. Make sure your chair is supportive and right height for level of pc. Taking a regular break from sitting and having a stretch, gently shaking your limbs and walking about for a few minutes can help too. Think about your breathing as well as your position when sitting n a chair - it's easy to start taking small shallow breaths if your body is hunched or squashed.

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Many thanks for the advice Loops. I did t'ai chi for a while but that was a long time ago now. Yoga has been suggested more recently. Instinct tells me walking is for the best - and I don't do enough of it.