So I went into the post office and asked "How much will it be to send this gift to the new love in my life?" the cashier said "First Class Mail?"
I said " No, average looking Female!"
Tell us a joke Page 94
Quote: FunyHaHA Not Funy Strange @ 28th February 2015, 7:35 PM GMTSo I went into the post office and asked "How much will it be to send this gift to the new love in my life?" the cashier said "First Class Mail?"
I said " No, average looking Female!"
I'd never heard that before, what with Chappers being the second oldest person of all time.
Unfortunately he's only the second oldest person on the BCG
Quote: FunyHaHA Not Funy Strange @ 28th February 2015, 7:35 PM GMTSo I went into the post office and asked "How much will it be to send this gift to the new love in my life?" the cashier said "First Class Mail?"
I said " No, average looking Female!"
So I went into the post office and asked "How much will it be to send this gift to a pop star?" the cashier said "First Class Mail?"
I said "No, just Russ, I'm not cool enough to write to Ron"
"Right" said the boss of the garage I was applying to be a mechanic, "let's see how much knowledge you have", pointing at a car.
After a look under the bonnet, I took a deep intake of breath and shook my head.
"Brilliant" he said. "When can you start?"
Quote: gappy @ 1st March 2015, 12:08 PM GMTSo I went into the post office and asked "How much will it be to send this gift to a pop star?" the cashier said "First Class Mail?"
I said "No, just Russ, I'm not cool enough to write to Ron"
A bit of a niche joke but I got a bit of a spark from it.
Quote: Chappers @ 3rd March 2015, 6:01 PM GMTA bit of a niche joke but I got a bit of a spsrk from it.
If only 2 of us get it, the forum is definitely big enough for the both of us.
The winning dog at crufts was excellent in every discipline.
Especially playing dead.
I was over the moon when I caught my son who I suspected was gay reading a porn magazine.
"Look at these dad" he said pointing, "they're amazing."
"Thank god" I laughed. "Yes, that's a very nice pair of tits."
"Breasts?" He replied. "I was on about those stunning heels."
ouch, a 70s confession movie it doesn't want it's joke back.
Quote: sootyj @ 24th March 2015, 3:07 PM GMTouch, a 70s confession movie it doesn't want it's joke back.
Cheers sooty 
Too soon?
Worst descent by a German in the French Alps since Schumacher.
sorry I usually think your stuffs awesome; but if I didn't point out when the blooms off the rose... would your trust my opinion?
Quote: Nick81 @ 24th March 2015, 3:27 PM GMTToo soon?
Worst descent by a German in the French Alps since Schumacher.
That's not my kinda joke, but it's certainly a workable piece of word play.
Quote: sootyj @ 24th March 2015, 3:29 PM GMTsorry I usually think your stuffs awesome; but if I didn't point out when the blooms off the rose... would your trust my opinion?
That's not my kinda joke, but it's certainly a workable piece of word play.
Hey, no worries Sooty, I more than appreciate feedback, I only write jokes and stuff for fun
I thought hated head of the EU Jean Claude Junkers had resigned
Turns out it was a different kind of German Plane that crashed.
A peeping Tom walks into a bra...