Iraq club

2 Turkish soldiers are crossing the stage, they bump into a bouncer.

Bouncer
Er are you 2 trying to invade Iraq?

Turkish1
Yes we are responding to Kurdish cross border raids.

Turkish2
What of it, are you UN, are you a Kurdish terrorist.

Bouncer
Nah I'm Dave, I'm a bouncer, and you can't come in, Iraqs already fully invaded, it's a health and safety issue, more than my jobs worth.

Turkish1
What do you mean fully invaded.

Bouncer
Well there's America, the UK, Al Quaeda, Islamic Jihad, private security companies. It's bloody heaving, its worse than Stringfellows on a Saturday night.

Turkish1
That's it we'll go home, maybe we can invade Morrocco instead.

Bouncer answers radio.

Bouncer
Hang about, you can go in lads. Turns out every ones gone to Afghanistan instead.

I realy like this twist on the bouncer "nightclub" routine lets face it the only differance between a nightclub on a weekend night and a war zone is geography. I am also glad you resisted the urge (If indeed you had one)to make a subplot on they can't invade because they are wearing trainers. very nice.

Thanks I just resisted, oi those tanks are casual!

Ha I like it Sooty, very good twist indeed, It can be adapter for a lot of topical sketches besides the war too.