PAPER KNICKERS
Laundry basket, midnight,
TIGHTS “Jesus what a day”
VEST “Tell me about it, all those bloody underpants did all day was moan about the humidity, I was stuck in there all day”
TIGHTS “Know what you mean they’re always full of bollox”
Comradely pause
VEST “Mind you, those new knickers seem quite nice”
TIGHTS “Yeah, I met them the other day, I got off with them”
VEST “No shit”
TIGHTS “Well actually there was”
VEST “NOOO, really”
TIGHTS “I tried not to make a big deal but I think they saw through me, they looked pretty browned off”
VEST “what happened”
TIGHTS “They went to pieces”
VEST “Oh dear”
TIGHTS “yeah, just disintegrated into tears”
There you go, not too rude considering the subject matter I hope.