One Liners Page 3

Quote: Craig H @ 17th October 2014, 9:03 AM BST

Is she any relation to the biggest selling female singer of all time, Mariah?

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No!

Quote: Someone has my nickname @ 16th October 2014, 10:27 PM BST

I saw a sign outside Sainsburys which read- Try Something new today. So, I walked home and had sex with my wife/husband.

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Was that during the middle of the sex-change?

Quote: Chappers @ 17th October 2014, 7:03 PM BST

Was that during the middle of the sex-change?

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I was wondering what to say about that! very good!

Quote: Chappers @ 17th October 2014, 7:03 PM BST

Was that during the middle of the sex-change?

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Good yin Chappers.

Just to clarify...When I said that one liners are all about delivery...obviously it was assuming that the one liner was a half decent joke in the first place...and I could see the 'Sainsbury' gag as having the best potential from the one liners posted hence my comment...

Figured it was obvious that people can't just stand up and say anything and make it funny.

My point is that studying delivery is as important as writing a good one liner...because even great ones can be delivered badly.

I agree

"I went to Sainsburys the other day and they told me to try something new today. So I went to Tesco next door".

"Next day" might just make it work.

I went to Sainsburys and said the delivery is very important to me, so I went home and waited.

I went to Sainsburys and they told me to try something new, so I had fruit juice with a splash of booze.

To be honest, it's a pretty weak punch.

Quote: Nogget @ 24th October 2014, 1:22 PM BST

I went to Sainsburys and they told me to try something new, so I had fruit juice with a splash of booze.

To be honest, it's a pretty weak punch.

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Were you drunk when you wrote that?

Quote: Nogget @ 24th October 2014, 1:22 PM BST

I went to Sainsburys and they told me to try something new, so I had fruit juice with a splash of booze.

To be honest, it's a pretty weak punch.

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I booked my jokes into intensive care, they needed better feeder lines.

I like my shopping aisles like I like my women!

Quote: Marc P @ 24th October 2014, 5:45 PM BST

I like my shopping aisles like I like my women!

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Well trollied?

I assume the answer is Well Stacked.

But it could be Full of Booze.

I'd write a joke but I don't even write cheques anymore

Full of beans obviously! Really some people!