British Comedy Guide

DIY Page 5

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 18th September 2014, 12:15 PM BST

Ummmm, if it wasn't for the reasonable charge (just call out is enough) then I would have said he was pulling your plonker. To me, if his meter made a sound then that indicated that there was a circuit - SO he's putting on a little act for you and when you mentioned the 9 wires he maybe thought he was rumbled and said yes, 3 cables, which is the same difference!!

One wonders what he would have charged if you had been completely green?

I offered to pay them at the time as I'd put aside a little for the work.

But they said no.

Now they haven't sent me an invoice.

It's making me feel like a reluctant thief and I'm not sure what to do.

Keep your gob shut!

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 26th September 2014, 3:48 PM BST

:) Wish I was rich.

Well we got a good deal! One guy quoted us the moon, whilst the guy we went with did it for a packet of fags.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 29th September 2014, 5:30 PM BST

I offered to pay them at the time as I'd put aside a little for the work.

But they said no.

Now they haven't sent me an invoice.

It's making me feel like a reluctant thief and I'm not sure what to do.

Why the guilt? Whistling nnocently Take it and run (well, after you have paid them)

Quote: Lee @ 30th September 2014, 8:00 AM BST

whilst the guy we went with did it for a packet of fags.

But look at the cost of them these days, and the price of fish & chips.

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 30th September 2014, 10:49 AM BST

Why the guilt? Whistling nnocently Take it and run (well, after you have paid them)

Herc, I don't understand the question.

It isn't guilt. It's that feeling of "did they send me an invoice?" when I know that they didn't send me an invoice. The idea that they sent me an invoice somehow seems more real. Anyhow, guilt is very underrated. It increases alertness. It is far too important to be ghettoised in arbitrary religions and the so-called law.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 30th September 2014, 4:04 PM BST

Herc, I don't understand the question.

It isn't guilt. It's that feeling of "did they send me an invoice?" when I know that they didn't send me an invoice. The idea that they sent me an invoice somehow seems more real. Anyhow, guilt is very underrated. It increases alertness. It is far too important to be ghettoised in arbitrary religions and the so-called law.

Bit deep for did they/didn't they ain't it? Life should be simple - like me. :)

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 30th September 2014, 5:02 PM BST

Bit deep for did they/didn't they ain't it? Life should be simple - like me. :)

So what bit do you put the hot soapy water on first?

Before the paint.

Is it the wood panel just above the carpet that goes all round the room?

Or the ceiling?

First of all what room is this?

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 30th September 2014, 6:50 PM BST

First of all what room is this?

It should be a bedroom but it only has my computer in it.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 30th September 2014, 7:09 PM BST

It should be a bedroom but it only has my computer in it.

So there shouldn't be any grease problem like you would get in a kitchen, and unless the walls and ceiling are really bad (old distemper) there should not be any need to wash them down. If you do then I would suggest sugar soap but you need to be reasonably careful with it and wear rubber gloves at least. You can also do the woodwork (skirting boards etc) but to get a good key I would rub all paint on the woodwork with a medium sandpaper say about 80 grit max. If you sugar soap the woodwork paint you need to give it a good rinse with plain water before painting.
Where did you read about using soapy water?

It all depends on how fussy/good the finished surface is you are trying to achieve. I mean you can just say f**k it and over paint everything as it is.

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 30th September 2014, 8:20 PM BST

So there shouldn't be any grease problem like you would get in a kitchen, and unless the walls and ceiling are really bad (old distemper) there should not be any need to wash them down. If you do then I would suggest sugar soap but you need to be reasonably careful with it and wear rubber gloves at least. You can also do the woodwork (skirting boards etc) but to get a good key I would rub all paint on the woodwork with a medium sandpaper say about 80 grit max. If you sugar soap the woodwork paint you need to give it a good rinse with plain water before painting.
Where did you read about using soapy water?

It all depends on how fussy/good the finished surface is you are trying to achieve. I mean you can just say f**k it and over paint everything as it is.

So sandpaper first, yes? Then sugar soap. I'm not sure what sugar soap looks like. Is it in a rectangular packet? I already have gloves because they came with my hyacinth bulbs. I did try to decorate once but I got gloss on myself and ended up in A and E. Panic really. It was a Friday night. When the drunks came in bleeding, I was told there would be a two hour wait so I just went home again and got in the shower.

To be honest, I wish those IQ tests that sometimes appear in the papers could be extended to DIY ability because I am totally convinced that in that respect I am far below the average. People say "well, you know, it's automatic" and I think "no". I haven't a clue either in comprehending it or in the physical coordination.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 30th September 2014, 8:31 PM BST

So sandpaper first, yes? Then sugar

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Quote: A Horseradish @ 30th September 2014, 8:31 PM BST

So sandpaper first, yes? Then sugar soap. I'm not sure what sugar soap looks like. Is it in a rectangular packet? I already have gloves because they came with my hyacinth bulbs. I did try to decorate once but I got gloss on myself and ended up in A and E. Panic really. It was a Friday night. When the drunks came in bleeding, I was told there would be a two hour wait so I just went home again and got in the shower.

To be honest, I wish those IQ tests that sometimes appear in the papers could be extended to DIY ability because I am totally convinced that in that respect I am far below the average. People say "well, you know, it's automatic" and I think "no". I haven't a clue either in comprehending it or in the physical coordination.

Either sandpaper or sugar soap (there is no need to do both), which can come in like a small washing powder box or a plastic tub if you want a larger quantity (you mix it with water). If the original paintwork is OK (that is not streaky or with bumps etc) then sugar soap would be fine or sand down to a nice flat surface.

A&E 'cos you got gloss paint on you?!?!?! What on earth were you doing with it?Clean off with White Spirit and then wash with soap and water.

I wouldn't call it automatic - you either have a flare for DIY or you don't - simple as that really. I find it real easy and a pleasure to see the finished result, and most of it is common sense.

By all means come back to me if you have any other queries or concerns. :)

Effin tired now and going to bed! ;)

Quote: A Horseradish @ 30th September 2014, 4:04 PM BST

Herc, I don't understand the question.

It isn't guilt. It's that feeling of "did they send me an invoice?" when I know that they didn't send me an invoice. The idea that they sent me an invoice somehow seems more real. Anyhow, guilt is very underrated. It increases alertness. It is far too important to be ghettoised in arbitrary religions and the so-called law.

Self employed people often take AGES to get around to sending you an invoice. By their very nature, most hate paperwork. So they will sometimes wait until they have a whole bunch to do, then do them all in one go.

Quote: billwill @ 1st October 2014, 12:34 AM BST

Self employed people often take AGES to get around to sending you an invoice. By their very nature, most hate paperwork. So they will sometimes wait until they have a whole bunch to do, then do them all in one go.

Like he said - the bill will come.

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