A Horseradish
Monday 15th September 2014 4:59pm [Edited]
8,475 posts
All The Facts You Need To Know About the Referendum
01. Salmond's wife is old enough to be his mother. She is nearly 77 and cooks him tea.
02. His own mother was a Conservative and a big fan of Winston Churchill.
03. While he moans daily about London toffs, he's never denied he's a millionaire.
04. When he joined SNP, they were very anti EU and they still were until the late 1980s.
05. The Scots mainly massacre Scots. There have been clan wars in most centuries.
06. Rather than being anti-Empire as they say, they had their own - Nova Scotia.
07. They wanted Panama but failed expensively; the reason independence was lost.
08. England had to protect Jamaica from them; but that's why Jamaica's flag has a saltire.
09. In the Union, the Scots were no less responsible for Empire than Team England.
10. Every member of the SNP youth movement is mentally aged 47 and weirdly square.
11. The claim that the Scots don't get the UK Governments they want is totally bogus.
12. Labour have won in 3 out of 4 - and have also mainly won in the Scottish Parliament.
13. SNP were on the far right of politics from the 1930s to the 1960s.
14. In 1979, the SNP voted with Margaret Thatcher against Labour on devolution.
15. There are so few SNP councillors from ethnic groups they couldn't form a football team.
16. SNP rival GCHQ in the amount of personal information they hold on voters.
17. Their success is partially due to placing every voter in a group and targeting support.
18. Among those they often ignore are people on council estates who rarely bother to vote.
19. While supposedly anti British, they intend to keep the BBC but call it SBC.
20. Salmond probably has doubts about independence himself; he expected devo-max.
