The first installment of my attempt to do an A-Z of sketches. Starting with A for alibi.
Int. Flat
Two men are sat at a table. A sniper rifle is on the table.
Man 1: We need to get our alibis straight. If the law come a knocking they have to be watertight.
Man 2: I got yer.
Man 1: If the police ask where you were the night that the prime minister got shot, what do you say?
Man 2: That I was not on the 15th floor of the BT Tower wielding (PICKS UP RIFLE) this L96 sniper rifle which has an effective range of 900m, weighs around 6.5 kg and has a muzzle velocity of 838 meters per second.
Man 2 puts down the rifle.
Man 1: No, you idiot! You tell them you were round at Denny Brown’s house watching the boxing.
Man 2: Denny who?
Man 1: Denny Brown!
Man 2: Denny Brown? Actually, I think I do know a Denny Brown.
Man 1: Of course you do! He’s your brother!
Man 2: Ah yes!
Man 1: So you’ve got it straight.
Man 2: Yeah. I, I, think so.
Man 1: What?
Man 2: This Denny, he’s my mother’s son right.
Man 1: Yes!
Man 2: But I thought I was my mother’s son.
Man 1: You are! She’s allowed more than one!
Man 2: Ok. So where does she come into this?
Man 1: Oh Jesus! Lets go back to the very start - does anyone know you’re here tonight?
Man 2: Nope.
Man 1: Good.
Man 1 picks up the rifle and shoots Man 2.
ENDS
