Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 2nd May 2014, 11:30 PM BSTThank you Iain Duncan Smith. Any other wise words about the job market?
If you're asked in for an interview, don't bring up your penis problems.
Things that piss you off Page 1,481
What about if they ask about them in the interview.
I'd like to work in Wetherspoons. I would like to pour wine out of a tap.
I have macho nachos but I don't like to boast.
Quote: Matthew Stott @ 2nd May 2014, 11:31 PM BSTIf you're asked in for an interview, don't bring up your penis problems.
And make cocktails in a jug, you might even make your clients happier than in your current career.
Quote: Jennie @ 2nd May 2014, 11:32 PM BSTI'd like to work in Wetherspoons. I would like to pour wine out of a tap.
No you wouldn't. There'd be sleazy old bastards trying to see down your front.
Quote: keewik @ 2nd May 2014, 11:34 PM BSTNo you wouldn't. There'd be sleazy old bastards trying to see down your front.
So exactly like being at the Bar then! Why do you think the judge's bench is always elevated?
Quote: sootyj @ 2nd May 2014, 11:34 PM BSTAnd make cocktails in a jug, you might even make your clients happier than in your current career.
My clients are very happy.
I got told that I was a "fit bird barrister" the other day. I was quite proud.
Quote: keewik @ 2nd May 2014, 11:29 PM BSTIt's not a matter of not being able to be totally honest with your friends. More that there are things more interesting to talk about than the pimple on your bum.
There are? Like what? Domestic chores? Celebrities? The cost of scones? The human experience is probably the most fascinating thing to talk about, plus it's great material for cracking off colour jokes.
Eg. When I was out last Friday night in my old local in Holborn, the owner had installed a new video game in the urinals. Some technical boffin created a racing game with a little Formula 1 car you can steer with your urine. It's pretty much all we talked about for the entire evening. The girls were a bit jealous they're wasn't something similar in the ladies. However, it did give me an opportunity to make a couple of great jokes about 'Wii remotes' and a 'literal pissing contest'.
Quote: Jennie @ 2nd May 2014, 11:35 PM BSTSo exactly like being at the Bar then! Why do you think the judge's bench is always elevated?
Is that a euphemism?
Quote: Jennie @ 2nd May 2014, 11:36 PM BSTWhy do you think the judge's bench is always elevated?
snigger snigger arf arf ooh er missus
Quote: Matthew Stott @ 2nd May 2014, 11:31 PM BSTIf you're asked in for an interview, don't bring up your penis problems.
Actually possessing one is not a problem Matthew. Though I could see how you would feel differently. 
Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 2nd May 2014, 11:36 PM BSTThere are? Like what? Domestic chores? Celebrities? The cost of scones? The human experience is probably the most fascinating thing to talk about, plus it's great material for cracking off colour jokes.
Eg. When I was out last Friday night in my old local in Holborn, the owner had installed a new video game in the urinals. Some technical boffin created a racing game with a little Formula 1 car you can steer with your urine. It's pretty much all we talked about for the entire evening. The girls were a bit jealous they're wasn't something similar in the ladies. However, it did give me an opportunity to make a couple of great jokes about 'Wii remotes' and a 'literal pissing contest'.
Thank God it was formula one, not formula number 2.
Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 2nd May 2014, 11:36 PM BSTEg. When I was out last Friday night in my old local in Holborn, the owner had installed a new video game in the urinals. Some technical boffin created a racing game with a little Formula 1 car you can steer with your urine. It's pretty much all we talked about for the entire evening. The girls were a bit jealous they're wasn't something similar in the ladies. However, it did give me an opportunity to make a couple of great jokes about 'Wii remotes' and a 'literal pissing contest'.
The Enterprise on Red Lion Street? That is right opposite the law school I teach at, and at the end of term I took all my students there.
THAT WAS ALL THE BLOKES COULD TALK ABOUT ALL FUCKING EVENING. Drove me insane.
Stupid idea.
Quote: Jennie @ 2nd May 2014, 11:36 PM BST
I got told that I was a "fit bird barrister" the other day. I was quite proud.
Don't get busted for soliciting.