British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 1,548

We said minnow

I bet this sort of thing is happening all over.

http://www.expressandstar.com/news/2014/05/02/parents-take-children-out-of-coseley-school-amid-knife-rumours/

Oh dear looks like it's going to be moral panic crashes into copy cat kids, all around bad.

Frankly I think it's a shame the kid that carried out the murder won't be hanged.

But meh capital punishment never works.

I'm amazed this hasn't happened before. A pupil of mine was expelled for carrying a knife to school. He later attacked a teacher in a special school with a Stanley Knife.
He was well known to carry. I'll be honest with you, I told him in no uncertain terms that if he attacked me or any of the pupils with a weapon I was going to smash a chair over his head. Harsh but fair I felt.

Quote: roscoff @ 2nd May 2014, 2:48 PM BST

I'll be honest with you, I told him in no uncertain terms that if he attacked me or any of the pupils with a weapon I was going to smash a chair over his head. Harsh but fair I felt.

Definitely!

Quote: Jennie @ 2nd May 2014, 10:39 AM BST

It is utterly pathetic and devalues actual racism.

I was trying to remember what replacement word I was taught for that rhyme. I think it was fish.

Apparently the fad today is tiger. :O

How do you catch a tiger by his toe?

I was always taught Tigger, Like the character in Winnie the Pooh. Although when I was kid I don't think I ever thought of the character or the fact that it didn't make sense.

Quote: roscoff @ 2nd May 2014, 2:48 PM BST

I'm amazed this hasn't happened before. A pupil of mine was expelled for carrying a knife to school. He later attacked a teacher in a special school with a Stanley Knife.
He was well known to carry. I'll be honest with you, I told him in no uncertain terms that if he attacked me or any of the pupils with a weapon I was going to smash a chair over his head. Harsh but fair I felt.

Good for you, can I donate you a chair.

The attitude towards violence this country is deranged.

There's a sort of assumption that the only people who should be violent are criminals and the unwell and we should all ring our hands about it.

Schools, hospitals all need better security. People don't visit NHS casualty wards at night because they're scared of the violence, that's just not right.

Quote: dannyjb1 @ 2nd May 2014, 10:13 AM BST

"The Mirror claimed that it worked with audio forensic experts to look into the video, which was taken from the third episode of series 19, aired in February 2013."

Just makes me think, really? surely these experts (noted as plural) have got better things to do, to be honest hasn't the Mirror got better stories to report?

There has been a concerted effort to get rid of JC for at least the last 15 years. Every single left wing, feminist, environmental pressure group wants his head on a stick.

'Discovering' discarded outtakes which should have been erased years ago sounds like an inside hatchet job. Somebody held onto this clip and waited until they needed a bit of spare cash and flogged it to The Mirror.

As host of the world's most viewed programme, it's unlikely that he'll lose his job. And even if he did, there are an army of producers who'd sign him up to present a show in a heartbeat. Hell, he could probably get his own show a la Piers Morgan on Fox News.

But times, they are a-changing, it seems viewers want more Dermot O'Leary / Philip Schofield types who they can take home to meet mother instead of outspoken, outrageous, controversial figures.

Clarkson, like the recent UKIP candidates, hasn't been able to keep pace with the digital world and the rapidly changing social views of the masses. Not that views have changed, just expressing them.

I see Harriet Harman is suggesting he be fired, as a serial speeder I thought she'd be a fan of Top Gear.
Never mind Jezzer just say you fancy 12 year old boys and she'll be defending you lickety spit.

Quote: Jennie @ 2nd May 2014, 10:39 AM BST

You commie, you Angry

It is utterly pathetic and devalues actual racism.

I was trying to remember what replacement word I was taught for that rhyme. I think it was fish.

Apparently the fad today is tiger. :O

How do you catch a tiger by his toe?

With an ambulance standing by, and a zookeeper with a tranquiliser gun.

Quote: sootyj @ 2nd May 2014, 7:34 PM BST

I see Harriet Harman is suggesting he be fired, as a serial speeder I thought she'd be a fan of Top Gear.
Never mind Jezzer just say you fancy 12 year old boys and she'll be defending you lickety spit.

Booyah!

Just watched Unreported World on Channel 4 showing the violent crime in South Africa and at the end of the show, they said that next week's one is about twins in Madagascar.

Apparently the small island in the Indian Ocean considers twins to be a 'curse' and many parents immediately throw them into an orphanage as soon as they are born. That's right, if they have twins, they abandon them. The world is a very strange place.

Inhumane bastards!

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 2nd May 2014, 8:12 PM BST

Booyah!

Just watched Unreported World on Channel 4 showing the violent crime in South Africa and at the end of the show, they said that next week's one is about twins in Madagascar.

Apparently the small island in the Indian Ocean considers twins to be a 'curse' and many parents immediately throw them into an orphanage as soon as they are born. That's right, if they have twins, they abandon them. The world is a very strange place.

Can't the Jewish lion and the hiphopatamus do something about it and the talking zebra.

Wait that's it that's the problem

It's the talking zebra making them do it.

Inhuman black and white minstrel shit.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-27248848

Honestly, I'm not sure how much longer the rail unions can keep the goodwill of the commuter onside. The three day strike is all set to go ahead because modern technology is making some people redundant - as it has done across every single other industry in existence.

It goes beyond mere inconvenience, some people rely on the Tube to get them to hospital appointments, care visits, flights, etc.

I lost sympathy an age ago, well done RMT like the NUM before a minority of fanatics will give the Conservatives a free pass to wreck unions and jobs.
Oh and they're threatening a general strike, ha.

Quote: keewik @ 2nd May 2014, 8:17 PM BST

Inhumane bastards!

They'd have put the Proclaimers in an orphanage the monsters.

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