I read the news today oh boy! Page 1,489

Quote: Jennie @ 2nd April 2014, 11:47 PM BST

I love Aldi. I live in Catford - we are grateful just to be able to eat. I have to hide my Waitrose bags though, doesn't go down well.

My Waitrose sugar aisle contemplation was disturbed today by two little brats trying to get in my way. Was about to unleash my fury upon them, until the mother shouted "Theodora, Dorothea, come to mummy." Figured the kids had enough to worry about in life.

I love supermarkets. I think it is why I have suddenly discovered Mumsnet. I am prematurely middle aged.

View original

Actually I have to admit I enjoy 'going the messages' as we say in Scotland, so you would be an acceptable daughter-in-law to me if you will only quell this obsession with Waitrose.

Is that a garahge or a garridge ?

Quote: keewik @ 2nd April 2014, 11:46 PM BST

I just threw M&S into the mix because I like their Extra Large Greenland Prawns and sometimes their potatoes.

I can't believe I'm wasting my life discussing the merits of supermarkets.

View original

Are you just getting extra grumpy to be ready for the possibility of independence.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 2nd April 2014, 11:51 PM BST

Mmm, I love seafood, especially crustaceans - prawns, crab, lobster, mussels, langoustines, etc.

Anyways keewik, what is your view on no longer being part of the Westminster circus - Question Time, PMQs, debates in the House, etc.?

Is the Scottish Parliament any more entertaining?

They have two pit bulls in their garage?

View original

I quite enjoy watching Scottish Parliament business but, really, politicians are all the same. If I were in charge my aim would be Scottish independence then invite the North of England to join us - and I think they might.

Quote: Jennie @ 2nd April 2014, 11:47 PM BST

I think it is why I have suddenly discovered Mumsnet.

View original

Nooooooo! Not Mumsnet. They're the people who want to ban everything, the socialist Stepford Wives, the breast cancer selfie brigade, the enemies of freedom, humour and individuality.

Quote: keewik @ 2nd April 2014, 11:56 PM BST

If I were in charge my aim would be Scottish independence then invite the North of England to join us - and I think they might.

View original

When you say invite, do you mean in a Crimea type way? Won't happen, the North of England has been devastated by the influx of immigrants, UKIP are even picking up votes there. Siding with a country that celebrates it's open door immigration policy is a non-starter.

I think mumsnet is often a lot funnier than the BCG

Quote: Oldrocker @ 2nd April 2014, 11:53 PM BST

Is that a garahge or a garridge ?

View original

Because I lived in America so long, I have a split personality over this particular pronunciation, so I even it out in my brain.

Garahge - where you put your car at night to go sleepy-sleeps.

Garridge - late night purveyors of petrol and pasties.

Quote: sootyj @ 3rd April 2014, 12:03 AM BST

I think mumsnet is often a lot funnier than the BCG

View original

Just had a quick look on there - they have a thread called 'Am I being unreasonable?' - It's exactly the same as our own 'Things that piss you off'.

I love the subterfuge in the use of language, a veiled, non-committal, self deprecating way of saying the exact same thing. 'Am I being unreasonable or should all black people be murdered at birth?' - yeah, like phrasing it in a question is going to get you off the hook. What a bunch of frauds.

Quote: sootyj @ 3rd April 2014, 12:03 AM BST

I think mumsnet is often a lot funnier than the BCG

View original

in an 'ironic' way?

Not entirely sure, I think some stuff is deliberate piss taking but done well.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 3rd April 2014, 12:02 AM BST

Nooooooo! Not Mumsnet. They're the people who want to ban everything, the socialist Stepford Wives, the breast cancer selfie brigade, the enemies of freedom, humour and individuality.

View original

You know, I went on there to take the piss, but Soots is right. Some of the stuff on there is very funny and a lot of the issues covered, particularly in the "Am I Being Unreasonable?" section are quite interesting.

They even have their own abbreviations. For example, "LTB" is Leave the Bastard, after the OP has discovered that DH (Dear Husband) has been DTD (doing the deed) with the OW (other woman)for months, whilst take the DCs (Dear children) to soft play.

HTH.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 3rd April 2014, 12:02 AM BST

Nooooooo! Not Mumsnet. They're the people who want to ban everything, the socialist Stepford Wives, the breast cancer selfie brigade, the enemies of freedom, humour and individuality.

When you say invite, do you mean in a Crimea type way? Won't happen, the North of England has been devastated by the influx of immigrants, UKIP are even picking up votes there. Siding with a country that celebrates it's open door immigration policy is a non-starter.

View original

Some years ago I was in Leeds and a local radio phone-in indicated that locals would be happy to be part of Scotland.

Quote: Jennie @ 3rd April 2014, 12:14 AM BST

They even have their own abbreviations. For example, "LTB" is Leave the Bastard, after the OP has discovered that DH (Dear Husband) has been DTD (doing the deed) with the OW (other woman)for months, whilst take the DCs (Dear children) to soft play.

HTH.

View original

Maybe DH wouldn't have DTD with the OW if DW had spent more time in FF (Fitness First) and less time on MN?

Quote: keewik @ 3rd April 2014, 12:14 AM BST

Some years ago I was in Leeds and a local radio phone-in indicated that locals would be happy to be part of Scotland.

View original

That is all the scientific proof I need.

Quote: sootyj @ 3rd April 2014, 12:03 AM BST

I think mumsnet is often a lot funnier than the BCG

View original

Hey, let's all go over there under assumed names and play with their forums !

I'll be 'Sterile of Wolverhampton.'

Quote: keewik @ 3rd April 2014, 12:14 AM BST

Some years ago I was in Leeds and a local radio phone-in indicated that locals would be happy to be part of Scotland.

View original

They also voted Jimmy Saville they're most favoured son.

Their judgement is a little wonky at times.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 3rd April 2014, 12:19 AM BST

Maybe DH wouldn't have DTD with the OW if DW had spent more time in FF (Fitness First) and less time on MN?

View original

Please sign up Renegade. They would love you.

I also use it as inspiration when I am stuck for sitcom plots. I am trying to write something family based and realised that it is quite hard to write about marriage when you aren't actually married. This thread has proved very useful:

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2042830-ridiculous-topics-for-marital-rows

"OK, so I caught myself getting cross at hubby when on family holiday for having fruit and fibre for breakfast as he was 'obviously' trying to engineer more 'me time' on the loo away from the kids."