British Comedy Guide

Status report Page 5,577

Quote: Ben @ 25th March 2014, 11:27 PM GMT

Ben has a 3 hour meeting about a new computer system tomorrow. He fears there will be no coffee break.

It's up to you to suggest it.

Quote: Ben @ 25th March 2014, 11:27 PM GMT

Ben has a 3 hour meeting about a new computer system tomorrow. He fears there will be no coffee break.

Just bring in a case of lager and after an hour say

Now let's get this party started

Quote: Ben @ 25th March 2014, 11:27 PM GMT

Ben has a 3 hour meeting about a new computer system tomorrow. He fears there will be no coffee break.

Y'see, this is what pisses me off about business today.

How could whoever set up this meeting know it would need to last three hours?

Just a crock of shit to fill diaries and make it/them look important.

(If it was you Ben, I'm posting this on behalf of zooo whose internet connection is down atm)

The meeting was 2 hours 40 minutes. No break, but I made the coffee beforehand.

I read today that the song that was number one on your 18th birthday is your "theme for life."

Number One in the UK Singles Chart on 11th July 2002 was...

Elvis vs JXL - "A Little Less Conversation".

Perhaps there is something in it.

On another note, can anyone recommend a decent laptop? I don't need anything fancy (although I like to stream video).

Quote: Jennie @ 26th March 2014, 7:57 PM GMT

I read today that the song that was number one on your 18th birthday is your "theme for life."

Conquest of Paradise by Vangelis.

Quote: Gordon Bennett @ 26th March 2014, 8:07 PM GMT

Conquest of Paradise by Vangelis.

Well, I think we now have a statistically significant sample. It must be true.

Hey Gordon what's it like making love to you?

Quote: Gordon Bennett @ 26th March 2014, 8:07 PM GMT

Conquest of Paradise by angels.

Is there some sort of guarantee.

Mines Simply Red which might explain why I'm dislikeable and short tempered.

And ginger?

No which is proof that God isn't entirely cruel.

I do have hair that if not cut back regularly turns into a "schizophrenia mullet"

Awww. I'm sure it is more "nutty professor" than "schizophrenia mullet".

I feel your pain. I had a "white girl's afro" until I was about 6.

Then I grew it as long as possible and actually had people sitting behind me in the cinema ask me to "move my huge hair" out of the way.

Then on the seventh day God invented industrial strength GHDs.

I had a Picasso style side parting for ages, now it's swept back in a vain attempt to hide my bald patch.

I'm going to have to change my avatar.

Quote: Jennie @ 26th March 2014, 8:27 PM GMT

Awww. I'm sure it is more "nutty professor" than "schizophrenia mullet".

I feel your pain. I had a "white girl's afro" until I was about 6.

Then I grew it as long as possible and actually had people sitting behind me in the cinema ask me to "move my huge hair" out of the way.

Then on the seventh day God invented industrial strength GHDs.

I used to have a Jewfro

the schizophrenia mullet is very specific, long on the back, bald from the ears forward with a few stragglers.

Trust me it's a diagnosis you could take to court.

Well, you'd be f**ked in North Korea.

If it's by number 14 I'm buying a ticket.

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