British Comedy Guide

Things that piss you off Page 1,410

Quote: zooo @ 21st March 2014, 10:38 AM GMT

Americans must be so shocked when they come here and see who we have on telly. Their soaps are full of models and plastic surgeried types. And we have Coronation Street...

What are you talking about?

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Quote: paulted @ 21st March 2014, 10:33 AM GMT

American TV series that always seem to be full of adolescent angst and "beautiful people"(even the adventure and sci-fi shows). Smallville, Tomorrow People, Agents of SHIELD, 90210, How I met your mother, Two Broke Girls, Arrow, etc. Yawwwwwn...... When they do have someone with "less than average" looks or unmuscular/overweight they are a comedy relief character. Rant over!

Yeah, because people want to see the adventures of fat, ugly people on their television shows.

'I need you to break into a top secret facility'

'I can't, my knees are shot and I have an appointment at the diabetic clinic'

This has to be the most ridiculous example of British low standards and self inflicted masochism that I've ever seen, actively complaining that the actors on television shows aren't ugly enough.

There is an unfair stereotype throughout the world that British women are total mingers. They get this stereotype because we champion absolute munters on the telly programmes we export to the rest of the planet. As long as people celebrate our disfigured, overweight thespians, you know, because they're small minded, jealous and have self esteem issues, they're actually damaging the reputation of every woman in Britain.

British male actors get an easier time of it because we've recently exported a ton of action stars, villains and interesting protagonists on film and television - Tom Hardy, Jason Statham, Benedict Cumberbatch, Hugh Dancy, Tom Hiddlestone, etc.

But our poor female actresses never get to make the same mark, because our casting directors and producers want to shove Olivia Coleman into everything. Ironically, there's nothing I want to shove into her.

:(

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 21st March 2014, 12:37 PM GMT

they're actually damaging the reputation of every woman in Britain.

If you say so.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 21st March 2014, 12:37 PM GMT

...there's nothing I want to shove into her.

Charming.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 21st March 2014, 12:37 PM GMT

...have self esteem issues...

I'm not sure who's the one with the self esteem issues at the moment.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ 21st March 2014, 12:56 PM GMT

:(

Aah, did I say a true thing that made you sad? Console

Quote: Gordon Bennett @ 21st March 2014, 1:02 PM GMT

I'm not sure who's the one with the self esteem issues at the moment.

Okay, I'll say it again, British people have self esteem issues. There, I hope that has clarified matters.

:O Self esteem issues? With people like you telling them they're ugly all the time? Where did they get them from?

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 21st March 2014, 12:37 PM GMT

Yeah, because people want to see the adventures of fat, ugly people on their television shows.

Cracker seemed pretty popular! And Pie in the Sky. It's nice to have one or two hotties to fall in lust with, but most people want good acting on telly, whatever body it's in.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 21st March 2014, 1:10 PM GMT

Aah, did I say a true thing that made you sad? Console

No, just something that made you sound like a horny twelve year old boy trapped in a grown mans body.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ 21st March 2014, 1:18 PM GMT

No, just something that made you sound like a horny twelve year old boy trapped in a grown mans body.

Perfect description of George Roper.

Quote: zooo @ 21st March 2014, 1:11 PM GMT

:O Self esteem issues? With people like you telling them they're ugly all the time? Where did they get them from?

Ugly British actors on television shows were around before I showed up. Difference being is that I'm honest about their ugliness and haven't been indoctrinated into the piss miserable low standards that abound in our entertainment industry.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ 21st March 2014, 1:18 PM GMT

No, just something that made you sound like a horny twelve year old boy trapped in a grown mans body.

Hey, if you can't attack the argument, why not attack the person who made the argument? That's a mature tactic.

What has ugliness of characters to do with alleged low standards of the entertainment industry?

If the character is supposed to be feeble according to the script it makes no sense for it to be played by a topmodel.

Would you cast the role of Baldrick with Hugh Jackman? (I'm sure the Yanks would!)

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 21st March 2014, 1:23 PM GMT

Ugly British actors on television shows were around before I showed up. Difference being is that I'm honest about their ugliness and haven't been indoctrinated into the piss miserable low standards that abound in our entertainment industry.

Having people on TV who you don't want to put your penis inside doesn't mean people are 'pretending' they're super good looking. It means they're possibly good actors who won a role.

If the Yanks want to present us their unrealistic dreamworld of beauties and "freedom", then so be it. Of course they would replace Shane McGowan with Justin Bieber as the singer of the Pogues, but is this really a good thing?

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 21st March 2014, 1:24 PM GMT

Hey, if you can't attack the argument, why not attack the person who made the argument? That's a mature tactic.

The argument is idiotic. And my reply was valid.

He's just trying to push buttons. I hear his mum has cut the power to the basement again. "Renegade, go out and have sex with women" - "Nah mam, somebody is wrong on the internet!".

Quote: Gordon Bennett @ 21st March 2014, 1:25 PM GMT

What has ugliness of characters to do with alleged low standards of the entertainment industry?

The low standards of physical attractiveness. From Adrian Chiles to Miranda Hart, Claire Balding to John McCririck and the regular cast of EastEnders - it's a munter fest of epic proportions.

For every Kate Middleton, there are 10 Fergies. I knew things crossed a line a few years ago when I overheard some blokes in a pub talking about how they'd shag Jade Goody. F**k's sake.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ 21st March 2014, 1:30 PM GMT

The argument is idiotic. And my reply was valid.

No, your replies were an unhappy face and then accusing me of being immature. You have said nothing that counteracts my argument whatsoever.

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