British Comedy Guide

Things that piss you off Page 1,374

Sick

Quote: Lee @ 6th February 2014, 3:24 PM GMT

Yet R.C does it for free. He's either not a very shrewd business man or incredibly generous!

Free, eh? I'm being charged a monthly rate for his "Get Your Dander Up & Let Off Steam Online" service. Although I am trying to pay in barter by providing introductions to Chinese women, whom he is yet to collect. They still await the UK husband and residency. Should there be any other takers.

Kenneth I recieved some of your chinese women by post and found them to have unacceptably large amounts of hound DNA.

Quote: sootyj @ 6th February 2014, 3:54 PM GMT

Kenneth I recieved some of your chinese women by post and found them to have unacceptably large amounts of hound DNA.

Obviously a Royal Mail mix-up. These ladies are southern Chinese of impeccable imperial pedigree. They desire only an opportunity to earn a better living than that offered by Chinese factories. They are prepared to tolerate a British husband - and possibly even to feign love - for the sake of gaining British residency. I have advised them to seek men who are comedy fans, as although generally inadequately financially proportioned, such fellows are less likely to be surly, miserable, lecherous drunks.

I'm pretty sure one of them was Oddjob, she didnt even take her hat off

Quote: zooo @ 6th February 2014, 3:21 PM GMT

Lol, she probably despises feminists more than you do.
Or pretends to. I doubt even 10% of the things she says she actually believes, she's purely winding people up to get paid, and it works!

I agree 100%, she's no different to the thousand other 'pundits' they wheel out to get a reaction or website hits. I just find the extreme reactions to her opinions to be hilariously over the top.

'She doesn't like the name Chardonnay! Kill her!'

Quote: sootyj @ 6th February 2014, 3:54 PM GMT

Kenneth I recieved some of your chinese women by post and found them to have unacceptably large amounts of hound DNA.

Were you promised a nice piece of ass? (you know, cuz Chinamen eat donkeys - geddit? Errr )

Quote: Lee @ 6th February 2014, 3:24 PM GMT

Yet R.C does it for free. He's either not a very shrewd business man or incredibly generous!

I'm a giver - in every sense of the word. Smarmy

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 6th February 2014, 1:30 PM GMT

At first I had little time for Katie Hopkins

Me neither, in fact I have even less time for her since she divorced Tom Cruise.

Whistling nnocently

Quote: Kenneth @ 6th February 2014, 4:08 PM GMT

Obviously a Royal Mail mix-up. These ladies are southern Chinese of impeccable imperial pedigree.

The one you posted to me was a defender for the Chinese national team.

Centreback?

Well I had to, they've got a game on Sunday

My one was in the same team and she was quite forward

striking

oh yes

Erm . . those of you that received one . . is it true?

What OR?

Quote: Shandonbelle @ 6th February 2014, 10:34 PM GMT

What OR?

I think he's referring to Kenneth's Third World human trafficking ring...sorry romantic matchmaking service. <3

Mine had bigger balls than methat's a good thing isn't it.

Quote: sootyj @ 6th February 2014, 10:45 PM GMT

Mine had bigger balls than methat's a good thing isn't it.

So far Kenneth has sent me a Chin, a Wang, a Wing, a Fang and a Dong. Christ knows what it's going to look like when I eventually put it together...but at least I won't be lonely. Teary

have you got a spare left arm, I've got 3 righties.

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