British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 1,405

Quote: zooo @ 14th January 2014, 1:33 PM GMT

Wouldn't expect it of an ex policeman. You'd think he'd be well used to not reacting emotionally in an altercation. What a psychopath.

I look at it the other way: If the cop had been in violent situations before, he would know when things were about to get deadly and reacted first to save his own life.

I bet that makes him even more deadly.

If he hadn't been shot, he'd have gone home, paid the babysitter and come back to beat the old codger to death with his kid.

Quote: zooo @ 14th January 2014, 1:33 PM GMT

Wouldn't expect it of an ex policeman. You'd think he'd be well used to not reacting emotionally in an altercation. What a psychopath.

To be fair, the man was using a phone in the cinema. No lower form of human.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ 14th January 2014, 1:37 PM GMT

To be fair, the man was using a phone in the cinema. No lower form of human.

Sherlock would have shot him for that.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ 14th January 2014, 1:36 PM GMT

Did the fact he had a gun mean that he took it that far and to that place in the first place?

Did the selfish, bullying, younger texter rely on his ability to kick shit out of an elderly man mean he took it that far and to that place in the first place?

Quote: Matthew Stott @ 14th January 2014, 1:37 PM GMT

To be fair, the man was using a phone in the cinema. No lower form of human.

Very true!

Still, with a choice of going to see a film in the same room as a phone, and in the same room as a gun, I know which I'd choose.

(To stay at f**king home.)

Quote: sootyj @ 14th January 2014, 1:37 PM GMT

Sherlock would have shot him for that.

Cor.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 14th January 2014, 1:38 PM GMT

Did the selfish, bullying, younger texter rely on his ability to kick shit out of an elderly man mean he took it that far and to that place in the first place?

Perhaps the old man did his best to stop the situation and the selfish loon was going to now attack him for daring to ask him politley to stop using his phone no matter what. Dunno. Only know what I read there. One man ended up dead over basically nothing that became something, though.

I have to be honest if I had a shooter, I'd probably shoot in order

People who text when they walk
People who listen to music on public transport
People who push in, in queues
People who breed zebras
zebras
Kids who ride on scooters
Families who ride on scooters on buses
People who eat fried chicken other than a hermetically sealed box
People who say ya get me
People who listen to music on public transport

Thats a big list so I'd probably need a machine gun or something.

Quote: zooo @ 14th January 2014, 1:39 PM GMT

Still, with a choice of going to see a film in the same room as a phone, and in the same room as a gun, I know which I'd choose.

I'd rather sit next to the retired ex-cop who hates texting in cinemas then the selfish, argumentative, violent texter, who when asked to show consideration to other people, threatens to beat up an elderly man.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ 14th January 2014, 1:43 PM GMT

Perhaps the old man did his best to stop the situation and the selfish loon was going to now attack him for daring to ask him politley to stop using his phone no matter what. Dunno. Only know what I read there. One man ended up dead over basically nothing that became something, though.

I can readily agree with this statement...and in fact, do.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 14th January 2014, 1:47 PM GMT

I'd rather sit next to the retired ex-cop who hates texting in cinemas then the selfish, argumentative, violent texter, who when asked to show consideration to other people, threatens to beat up an elderly man.

Good luck with the ricochets!

Quote: zooo @ 14th January 2014, 1:48 PM GMT

Good luck with the ricochets!

Let's look at the statistics of zooo's survival odds -

Chance of being killed by an angry chav with no gun - 100 to 1

Chance of being shot by a retired policeman - 10000000 to 1

Good luck with leaving the house!

Chance of me kicking an any angry chav in the nuts and gouging their eyes out with my keys if they threaten me - good to firm.

(I don't know how to write odds.) :(

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 14th January 2014, 1:47 PM GMT

I'd rather sit next to the retired ex-cop who hates texting in cinemas /.../

I find that shooting people dead is terribly distracting in a cinema.

Even worse than texting.

Quote: zooo @ 14th January 2014, 2:06 PM GMT

(I don't know how to write odds.) :(

Me neither and the odds I quoted I just done made up in my brains.

Quote: Nogget @ 14th January 2014, 2:21 PM GMT

I find that shooting people dead is terribly distracting in a cinema.

Even worse than texting.

Laughing out loud Laughing out loud

This doesn't matter, obviously. But I wonder, if you and your husband get shot at the cinema, do they at any point reimburse you for the tickets? And the rest of the people in the audience.

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