So this guy walks into a bar and he orders a pint of vodka
what does the barmaid say to him?
A man walks into a bar...
BARMAID
Blavod?
MAN
Totally wrecked.
Barmaid refuses to serve him and calls the bouncers
What do the bouncers say?
BOUNCERS
Blavod?
BARMAID
Totally wrecked.
Quote: stonked @ 30th November 2013, 12:08 AM GMTBOUNCERS
Blavod?BARMAID
Totally wrecked.
END
Funny perfect end
Thank you stonked I liked that
A woodworm walks in to a bar and says..........
Is the bar-tender here
(leave it Steve sunshine, leave it)
Will Mellor walks into a bar and says....
Two pints of lager and a packet of crisps
Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 30th November 2013, 6:37 PM GMTA woodworm walks in to a bar and says..........
Is the bar-tender here
(leave it Steve sunshine, leave it)
nice
A man walks into a bar
and is informed he needs another 6 years training before he can practise law
A woman walks into a bar and starts complaining and moaning about her husband to the bartender.
The bartender says "Sorry love but this isn't a whine bar"
A man walks into a bar and orders a pint of jelly to go..the barman threw a wobbly.
A man walks into a bar...OUCH
He stubbed his toe on the doorstep
An Englishman, Irishman, and Scotsman walk into a bar. Unusually wide doorway at that establishment. No, seriously, it had been adapted, at quite some expense. They had to use a specially reinforced lintel. The whole facade of the building had to be remodelled, actually, to accommodate this widened entrance: took a long time, too, and there was a fair bit of paperwork, because it was a listed building. Still, the landlord felt that it had been worth the investment of finances and effort, because his concept was that the dilated point of ingress gave the venue a welcoming atmosphere, and he predicted that this would result in an increased footfall for the pub, and therefore increase revenue. And, on this evidence, he was probably correct; after all, at this one randomly selected moment there were no fewer than three customers entering the business simultaneously.
And two of them had travelled quite some way to be there.
Quote: Shandonbelle @ 30th November 2013, 10:24 PM GMT
A man walks into a bar and orders a pint of jelly to go..the barman threw a wobbly.
booyah
A man walks into a a bar made up of cans of stella and guiness
then he goes to listen to an opera
well it is the bar beer can
Quote: gappy @ 1st December 2013, 7:00 PM GMTAn Englishman, Irishman, and Scotsman walk into a bar. Unusually wide doorway at that establishment. No, seriously, it had been adapted, at quite some expense. They had to use a specially reinforced lintel. The whole facade of the building had to be remodelled, actually, to accommodate this widened entrance: took a long time, too, and there was a fair bit of paperwork, because it was a listed building. Still, the landlord felt that it had been worth the investment of finances and effort, because his concept was that the dilated point of ingress gave the venue a welcoming atmosphere, and he predicted that this would result in an increased footfall for the pub, and therefore increase revenue. And, on this evidence, he was probably correct; after all, at this one randomly selected moment there were no fewer than three customers entering the business simultaneously.
And two of them had travelled quite some way to be there.
Quote: Tursiops @ 1st December 2013, 7:09 PM GMT
I'm thinking of trying to sell that to Stewart Lee.
Edit: Not your smily face, my joke. I got a bit confused with the quoting 