British Comedy Guide

This is not a pop at a poster Page 3

Naa not about a lot of things, I think it's snipers most I hate most, but it's my fault as they get to me too easy.

They remind of the kids who stand by teachers at play time who always stunk of Vicks Vapo rub, the internet's a God send to them as they can answer back anonymously and get that 'space Cadet' glow and the front of their trousers feel all warm, but for me you can still smell the Vicks.

On the plus side
I had a nice night out tonight went round to ours friends and played Monopoly by the rules, it is a completely different game when you adhere to the rules it really is, every house has different rules like all the fines in Free Parking etc.

We have been playing a few nights a week for awhile and for such an old game it is still real fun.

Edders, you may enjoy this book:

http://www.amazon.com/Monopoly-Worlds-Most-Famous-Game--/dp/0306815745

While waiting for my car's windscreen to be replaced in an Australian town a few years back, I found the local library, failed to find a biography of Tintin author Herge and instead chanced upon the Monopoly book, which was quite educational.

You, Sooty and Rene Carpark should pop over to Indonesia some time for a night on the tiles.

Rene Carpark has he had the old Bangcockgone chop

Quote: sootyj @ 28th November 2013, 11:26 PM GMT

Rene Carpark has he had the old Bangcockgone chop

It's precisely this sort of cryptic riddling that confirms whatever Padders was accusing you of.

I once offered to fix Rene up with a job, a wife and a regular stand-up gig in Asia, but he declined. Stand-up comedy is gaining in popularity in these parts. I find it unbearable. The exception is Bill Bailey.

This is too good an opportunity to pass up!

So I thought I'd Stick my oar in,
Teddy, Just for laughs, I thought I'd "Quote" a few of your lines and give you the translation of how it reads to me in internetland!

QUOTE: Belay your concerns Will,
TRANSLATION: I'm using Belay in a sentence! how Clever am I!!!!!!

QUOTE: I'm not a rash person in real life,
TRANSLATION: I'm stubborn, difficult and don't like people telling me what to do ok!

QUOTE:However given you didn't see what Sooty wrote and then quickly deleted you wouldn't be able to really judge fairly, would you?
TRANSLATION: Your Judgement was unfair, and I won't accept that you are right!

QUOTE: The tactic used is all to common on this site,
TRANSLATION: everybody picks on me :(

QUOTE: As for me being unable to deal with people, you are very very very wide of the mark as I am in reality a very reasonable person.
TRANSLATION: And I'll punch your head in if you disagree got it!

QUOTE: I have never in my life let a friend down.
TRANSLATION: All my friends are still up in my treehouse, I've got the ladder so that's where they are staying!

QUOTE: In reality all I am is an unknown writer who is trying hard to get recognised.
TRASLATION:
In reality, All I'll ever be is an unknown writer trying to get recognised.

QUOTE: I post more comedy that I do arguments ,
TRANSLATION: I must post a lot of comedy!

QUOTE: the only difference is I react to snide remarks and unfair snipes, I always have and always will, because you need to in real life to a degree you really do.
TRANSLATION: I'm difficult to work with!

QUOTE: never mistake standing up for yourself as the actions of someone who is hard to deal with, if you do then you're in for a rude awakening.
TRANSLATION: I'm difficult to work with!

QUOTE: If polite society is standing there smiling as someone drops thinly disguised insult after insult at you and you don't react,that's not polite society,it just means you're a coward who is unsure of their worth.
TRASLATION: I'm terrified someone might think I'm a coward as that's the worst person you can be!

QUOTE: So in conclusion
TRANSLATION: this post isn't even halfway through yet!

QUOTE: Round our way we call it looking after yourself.
TRANSLATION: I stick up for myself, I'm not a coward!

QUOTE: because it's how you feel inside that counts as far as I'm concerned.
TRANSLATION: I don't care if I'm difficult, don't listen, or hard to work with as long as I don't do anything to make me look weak as I couldn't stand being called a coward got it!

Well I've read it back and although you could take it the wrong way and think I'm having a go, I think I'll post it anyway as it made me laugh and hopefully you'll see the funny side. after all this thread needs a funny side!

Laughing out loud You are a psychiatrist and I claim my £5.

Quote: FunyHaHA Not Funy Strange @ 28th November 2013, 11:50 PM GMT

QUOTE: If polite society is standing there smiling as someone drops thinly disguised insult after insult at you and you don't react,that's not polite society, it just means you're a coward who is unsure of their worth.
TRANSLATION: I'm terrified someone might think I'm a coward as that's the worst person you can be!

This could be remedied by reading the Malory Towers series by Enid Blyton. Highly instructive books for people who've slipped off the rails in the personality department. They are also terribly moving books and I dare anyone to read, without weeping, the scene where June and Amanda make their peace in Last Term at Malory Towers. If there's one (or two) thing(s) those schoolgirls learn, it's not to be cowards and to never lose their tempers.

Well done girls, a concerted effort, you may not be funny but no one can doubt your enthusiasm.

Funny Ha Ha Not Funny Strange.

The name you chose for yourself speaks volumes for me, it's like the opening line of a police interview with someone who is making a community uncomfortable.

Kweewik

I had no idea you write Pantos for church halls, it's a commendable past time that probably gives you access to all sorts, so kudos for your stealth.

Kenneth
You're Australian!

Quote: FunyHaHA Not Funy Strange @ 28th November 2013, 11:50 PM GMT

QUOTE: In reality all I am is an unknown writer who is trying hard to get recognised.
TRASLATION:
In reality, All I'll ever be is an unknown writer trying to get recognised.

Quote: FunyHaHA Not Funy Strange @ 28th November 2013, 11:50 PM GMT

although you could take it the wrong way

Not sure how you could take the above any other way than being f**king rude and unnecessary.

Pour your talents into improving yourself rather than putting others down, Tony.

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ 29th November 2013, 7:39 AM GMT

Kenneth
You're Australian!

Proudly so, too (mostly on account of the animals and the solitude), though rarely given to jingoism. I've lived most my life outside Australia, so the invitation for a night out in Indonesia (or China or Singapore, if you'd prefer) still stands. They churn out a lot of sitcoms and soaps here and take just about any old scripts. Witty banter likely lost in translation, but all good/bad experience.

And I really do recommend the Malory Towers series. Blyton at her best. Some of the jokes played on the mamzelles seem beyond the realms of physical possibility - and there are more laughs in the Five Find Outers series - but it's the raw emotions of tough life lessons that make Malory Towers so great.

Why, Thank you Teddy, That's one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me! I'm moved :)

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ 29th November 2013, 7:39 AM GMT

Kweewik

I had no idea you write Pantos for church halls, it's a commendable past time that probably gives you access to all sorts, so kudos for your stealth.

???????? Incomprehensible.

Quote: keewik @ 29th November 2013, 12:04 PM GMT

???????? Incomprehensible.

Teddy hasn't realised that you are a wee Scottish lady pensioner, he seem st think you are a big braw laddie with ulterior motives.

Laughing out loud :D

I had no idea it was an old lady, it's not like you can smell kippers, piss and talc on the net.

She's a nasty piece of work though, who goes after posters families.

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ 1st December 2013, 1:53 PM GMT

I had no idea it was an old lady, it's not like you can smell kippers, piss and talc on the net.

She's a nasty piece of work though, who goes after posters families.

No she is not.

You have quite simply exaggerated in your mind an observation she made about your postings. It's a common effect on on-line forums and gives rise to many a flame war.

The unfounded comments that you have made about Keewik are much worse than the observation she made about your postings.

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