British Comedy Guide

Boiled Egg!

BILL AND PAUL ARE BOTH 81 YEARS OLD:

PAUL
You want to get yourself a young woman like mine, she's 36 years old and 36/21/34 Keeping her happy keeps me young!

BILL
Were not all as luck as you,
My wife's still alive!

PAUL
What about sex?

BILL
WE haven't done that in years, I can't anymore even if I wanted to, much to my wife's relief!

PAUL
You need to change your diet my friend, Have you tried EGGS?

BILL
Eggs?

PAUL
I have two boiled eggs in the morning, by the time I've finished them I'm rock solid and ready to go!

BILL
I Guess its worth a try!

NEXT MORNING BILL IS IN THE KITCHEN BOILING HIMSELF TWO EGGS

BILLS WIFE CALLS DOWN FROM THE BED ROOM.

If that's an egg your boiling, you only need to cook it for 4.5 minutes, if all your trying to do is make it go hard!

BILL SHOUTS UP TO WIFE!

YOU MEAN YOU'VE KNOWN ABOUT THIS ALL THESE YEARS, AND HAVE NEVER TOLD ME??????

Superb. Very good punchline.

Boom boom tshhh. Very good .

It's not really a sketch. It's more a joke you'd hear someone in their 50s tell. It's nice enough, but not really that original.

I agree with Ben it's also a little clunky in getting to the exposition.

Well thank you for your comments (particularly the first two! lol)
It was just something that come to me late last night thought I'd put it up hopefully make some one laugh.

That made me chuckle. Well done m8!

I remember a joke similar to that from years back - something to do with worms.

I have to be honest, I don't really get it, is the joke that hard boiled eggs make your penis hard?

Sorry, I'm probably being thick.

It's a double entendre, he thinks eating hard boiled eggs will make him tumesent, his wife thinks he's asking for advice on boiling hard boiled eggs, when he hears her advice he assumes she's been deliberately holding back said information.

It's actually sort of tragic, Pinteresque.

I think Ben has this one cracked.

Ok, Telling these types of jokes is never an Eggact science!
Making jokes about a mans penis can be very hard!
But I shellnot be put off!
I Soldier on!
To make a good egg joke you have to brake a few omelettes!
but this was more about getting laid!
as an egg joke goes its all white!
I had a free range!
One more feather in the cap!
Better to be brave enough to try then always be a-fried!
well that's enough egg puns I'm exhausted!

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