British Comedy Guide

Status report Page 5,267

Quote: sootyj @ September 7 2013, 10:08 AM BST

Sootyj has been offered an ongoing post with a digital media production company as a writer.

Now to negotiate the money.

Never mind how much they pay you it'll be too much!

My eyes are hurting from excessive rolling.

Day gig shortly. I'm not expecting much of a turnout.

Hey Roscoff social services just hired me to mow your back hair

Quote: roscoff @ September 7 2013, 12:03 PM BST

Never mind how much they pay you it'll be too much!

Some of us are community minded

Quote: Will Cam @ September 7 2013, 10:24 AM BST

Well done. Wear knee pads and tie your hair back.

My hair is tied back in a pony tail like Oldrocker, nowadays, after I found a packet of girlie hairbands in one of those Everthing corner shops.

Hairband colour matched to the colour of my shirt.

Rolling eyes

Quote: billwill @ September 7 2013, 1:58 PM BST

My hair is tied back in a pony tail like Oldrocker, nowadays, after I found a packet of girlie hairbands in one of those Everthing corner shops.

Hairband colour matched to the colour of my shirt.

Rolling eyes

Welcome to the Ponytail Illuminati.

Quote: billwill @ September 7 2013, 1:58 PM BST

My hair is tied back in a pony tail like Oldrocker, nowadays, after I found a packet of girlie hairbands in one of those Everthing corner shops.

Hairband colour matched to the colour of my shirt and my lipstick

Rolling eyes

I bet you look divine

Quote: Tuumble @ September 5 2013, 12:28 PM BST

Do giraffes bark? You learn something new every day

They baaaah like sheep, according to this one. http://www.mrthorne.com/category/geraldinegiraffe/

Quote: billwill @ September 7 2013, 1:58 PM BST

My hair is tied back in a pony tail like Oldrocker, nowadays, after I found a packet of girlie hairbands in one of those Everthing corner shops.

Hairband colour matched to the colour of my blouse

I've also started wearing women's silky lingerie - God, I've never felt so alive!!!

Rolling eyes

The fungus on my big toe nail is not disappearing despite dipping my feet in vinegar, and I do not want to spend £16.79 on Curanail.

OVER SHARE.

If I were to put a value on not having fungi growing on bits of me, it would definitely be over £16.79.

I believe that nail infections are particularly stubborn diseases. Wouldn't it be cheaper to go see the doctor and get a prescription?

Or go to the doctors and get anti fungal tablets. My dad had that.

I am feeling that smug 'I'm in control of my life' feeling I get when my to do list is under control. As pathetic as I am, it makes me really happy. It is also a rarity as I live in almost constant chaos.

Quote: zooo @ September 7 2013, 7:09 PM BST

OVER SHARE.

Ok, if it wasn't for the dog I would be the shortest person in the house

I read on the internet that it is very stubborn to get rid of even with prescription tablets, so I have decide I will paint my toe nails black instead, I also read on the internet that it is a sign of other things that might be wrong so I am also taking two aspirin a day just in case

Quote: Raymond Terrific @ September 7 2013, 7:12 PM BST

If I were to put a value on not having fungi growing on bits of me, it would definitely be over £16.79.

I was quoting Home Bargain prices

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