British Comedy Guide

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How;s the Skegness tourist board trying to persuade CLiff Richard to move there?

Quote: Lee @ August 28 2013, 7:34 PM BST

Come to Skeggy it isn't classy enough for anal sex :(

I can see a few problems with that.

Quote: Lee @ August 28 2013, 6:54 PM BST

I f**king live there :(

You have a lot of off shore wind turbines I noted. I was there at a brass band contest. Also ran from the holiday camp down as far as the pier. I imagine the place to have been quite lively once upon a time but it looks a bit run down now. No offence Lee Lord of Skeggy :)

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So the truth about Skegness and bum sex is true after all!

Soots! You are ruining my childhood memories of sitting on the beach with my beloved (and now deceased) granny! Angry

Quote: Jennie @ August 28 2013, 8:03 PM BST

Soots! You are ruining my childhood memories of sitting on the beach with my beloved (and now deceased) granny! Angry

It's like his calling :|

Quote: Jennie @ August 28 2013, 8:03 PM BST

Soots! You are ruining my childhood memories of sitting on the beach with my beloved (and now deceased) granny! Angry

Now how can I ruin it anymore than the knowledge it's full of Lee?

Quote: Jennie @ August 28 2013, 1:17 PM BST

"Hi Jennie.

I'm just going to be honest with you. You're hot and stunning. I don't want a relationship, don't want lies or any of that stuff, I just want a physical relationship. I love giving and pleasuring...prefer not to receive.. (I don't like strap ons).

Would you be interested in something like that?"

To which the answer is yes, yes I am - where do I sign up?

I know a woman who's now happily married to a man she met on a dating site, and apparently one of the things which distinguished him from the other respondents was the fact he was the only one of them who didn't send her a picture of his knob.

Quote: Jennie @ August 28 2013, 8:03 PM BST

Soots! You are ruining my childhood memories of sitting on the beach with my beloved (and now deceased) granny! Angry

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADtADJOJZUU

Quote: Lee @ August 28 2013, 8:38 PM BST

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADtADJOJZUU

I think I snogged him behind the beach huts when I was 14. :D

Quote: Nogget @ August 28 2013, 8:17 PM BST

I know a woman who's now happily married to a man she met on a dating site, and apparently one of the things which distinguished him from the other respondents was the fact he was the only one of them who didn't send her a picture of his knob.

That's encouraging. To be fair to this chap, there wasn't any photos of his manhood attached.

I haven't received one of them for ages.

Maybe I'm losing my touch :(

Quote: roscoff @ August 28 2013, 8:06 PM BST

It's like his calling :|

To be an annoying little...

Yep, probably is.

I never get the thing of swopping photos of either or any genders genitalia, I mean in fairness they're never very attractive.

Bottoms can be quite aesthetically pleasing. But the front bits, it's like going to an art gallery and looking at the plumbing.

Quote: Jennie @ August 28 2013, 8:52 PM BST

To be an annoying little...

Yep, probably is.

Ouch that's going in the worst insult thread!

Quote: sootyj @ August 28 2013, 8:59 PM BST

Ouch that's going in the worst insult thread!

I'm not capable of being mean. It's a disability.

Women know your limits!

http://www.boredpanda.com/funny-dating-tips-from-1938/

Ha, don't sit in awkward positions!

You're not referring to Skegness are you Zooo?

(nb the last panel got a laugh out loud from me, even if it's kinda sinister)

I do most of those.

Apart from the make up one.

And the talking whilst dancing one.

And the drinking one.

And the flirting with other men one.

But I DO wear a bra. I have been known to have a tug at my girdle though.

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