British Comedy Guide

Online Dating Page 23

Quote: roscoff @ August 27 2013, 1:04 PM BST

This is evidently true and as soon as L.E. undoes these chains and lets me out of my box I'll be around to show Jennie my night vision glasses and selection of video recording equipment.

A few photos just so you get a flavour

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Me at work

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Me in front of my extensive library

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Breakfast at L.E.'s

Even more hilarious because we all know he's a primary school teacher. :D

Quote: Aaron @ August 27 2013, 3:39 PM BST

Even more hilarious because we all know he's a primary school teacher. :D

I may be in the wrong career. That's what the pupils keep telling me anyway.

My mate teaches in the next classroom to me and on the last day one of his pupils came in and said that I was dancing in my classroom with the other kids. Apparently not one of them batted an eye. However the little girl standing next to him did utter the immortal words 'Do I really have to go in there next year sir?'
I think you've reached the pinnacle in teaching when the kids are more scared of you than you are of them :)

Laughing out loud Brilliant.

What sort of dance were you doing, Roscoff? The twist?

Quote: Ben @ August 27 2013, 5:38 PM BST

What sort of dance were you doing, Roscoff? The twist?

Just cutting a few shapes to Tiger Feet a classic I'm sure you'll agree.

I can so picture you on some techno futuristic version of Thats Life in the Future.
With all your kids discussing how much you influenced them, how great you are and how much your knob ressembles a mangle wurzel.

Quote: sootyj @ August 27 2013, 7:12 PM BST

and how much your knob ressembles a mangle wurzel.

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Uncanny isn't it (I've actually met this guy)

That's Uncle Albert.

I know I said I was quitting, and I am, but I just can't seem to tear myself away. This morning I received this little gem. Gentlemen, if you want to know how to woo a lady, I suggest you look to this fine specimen for tips:

"Hi Jennie.

I'm just going to be honest with you. You're hot and stunning. I don't want a relationship, don't want lies or any of that stuff, I just want a physical relationship. I love giving and pleasuring...prefer not to receive.. (I don't like strap ons).

Would you be interested in something like that?"

To which the answer is yes, yes I am - where do I sign up?

Quote: roscoff @ August 27 2013, 7:26 PM BST
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Quote: Jennie @ August 28 2013, 1:17 PM BST

"Hi Jennie.

I'm just going to be honest with you. You're hot and stunning. I don't want a relationship, don't want lies or any of that stuff, I just want a physical relationship. I love giving and pleasuring...prefer not to receive.. (I don't like strap ons).

Would you be interested in something like that?"

Veeeeeeeeeery sexy!

Quote: Jennie @ August 28 2013, 1:17 PM BST

I know I said I was quitting, and I am, but I just can't seem to tear myself away. This morning I received this little gem. Gentlemen, if you want to know how to woo a lady, I suggest you look to this fine specimen for tips:

"Hi Jennie.

I'm just going to be honest with you. You're hot and stunning. I don't want a relationship, don't want lies or any of that stuff, I just want a physical relationship. I love giving and pleasuring...prefer not to receive.. (I don't like strap ons).

Would you be interested in something like that?"

To which the answer is yes, yes I am - where do I sign up?

I just got the same one, I think his monitors broken.

Quote: Gordon Bennett @ August 28 2013, 1:24 PM BST

Veeeeeeeeeery sexy!

Sick

OMG. What on earth dating website are you on???

SuckOnU.com

EarlyBackDoors.com

Quote: L.E. @ August 28 2013, 1:40 PM BST

OMG. What on earth dating website are you on???

An amusingly bad one.

Quote: sootyj @ August 28 2013, 1:41 PM BST

EarlyBackDoors.com

What... Actually, I don't want to know.

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