British Comedy Guide

Put your own punch in

Please feel free to put your own punchline in as mine I fear only amuses me.

We see the standard serial killer incident room

DCI HARRIS
The forensic psychologist reckons that our suspect has an IQ well above the 200 mark.

DC GOODY
How did they establish that sir?

DCI HARRIS
Each victim was groomed and lured to their death on the strength of a single Tweet from a total stranger and that's not easy given that Twitter only allow 140 letters to do it in.

DC GOODY
He must be smart sir.

DCI HARRIS
He is Goody and remember we are dealing with a criminal genius not a normal one, so don't answer any Tweets or retweet anything during this investigation even if they are from people you know!

DC GOODY
What not even from my mum sir?

DCI HARRIS
Especially not that slut.

This is best I could do:

DC GOODY

Sir, what exactly is a tweet?

FFS I thought mine was bad!

Carlos I normally acknowledge effort when I see it, but at the moment I'm struggling not to go looking for you in my car.

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ August 7 2013, 6:11 PM BST

FFS I thought mine was bad!

Carlos I normally acknowledge effort when I see it, but at the moment I'm struggling not to go looking for you in my car.

I don't think you will come looking for me, you would never pay to cross that bridge

DC GOODY
What not even from my mum sir?

DCI HARRIS
No exceptions, Goody. Tell her from now on she'll have to text you when your tea's ready.

DCI HARRIS
He is Goody and remember we are dealing with a criminal genius not a normal one, so don't answer any Tweets or retweet anything during this investigation even if they are from people you know!

DC GOODY
What not even from my mum sir?

DCI HARRIS
For f**ks sake Goody, Stephen Fry is not your mum

Quote: AJGO @ August 7 2013, 6:33 PM BST

DCI HARRIS
He is Goody and remember we are dealing with a criminal genius not a normal one, so don't answer any Tweets or retweet anything during this investigation even if they are from people you know!

DC GOODY
What not even from my mum sir?

DCI HARRIS
For f**ks sake Goody, Stephen Fry is not your mum

That's a winner.

DCI HARRIS
He is Goody and remember we are dealing with a criminal genius not a normal one, so don't answer any Tweets or retweet anything during this investigation even if they are from people you know!

DC GOODY
What not even from my mum sir?

DCI HARRIS
Hashtag; noonecaresaboutyourmum

DC SMITH
Retweet!

Quote: stonked @ August 7 2013, 6:31 PM BST

DC GOODY
What not even from my mum sir?

DCI HARRIS
No exceptions, Goody. Tell her from now on she'll have to text you when your tea's ready.

I like that one

Stonked's is the one for me.

DC GOODY:
What not even from my Mum sir?

DCI HARRIS:
Not even your Mum, Goody. You'll just have to poke her on Facebook like the rest of the station.

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ August 7 2013, 5:49 PM BST

DCI HARRIS
He is Goody and remember we are dealing with a criminal genius not a normal one, so don't answer any Tweets or retweet anything during this investigation even if they are from people you know!

DC GOODY
What not even from my mum sir?

DCI HARRIS
Not even your mum Goody.

DC GOODY
Right I'll tell her now sir, just as soon as I let her out. She has only gone and got herself locked in the holding cell!

DCI HARRIS
(Showing phone) Mine too! I was just on the way to let her out

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ August 7 2013, 5:49 PM BST

Please feel free to put your own punchline in as mine I fear only amuses me.

We see the standard serial killer incident room

DCI HARRIS
The forensic psychologist reckons that our suspect has an IQ well above the 200 mark.

DC GOODY
How did they establish that sir?

DCI HARRIS
Each victim was groomed and lured to their death on the strength of a single Tweet from a total stranger and that's not easy given that Twitter only allow 140 letters to do it in.

DC GOODY
He must be smart sir.

DCI HARRIS
He is Goody and remember we are dealing with a criminal genius not a normal one, so don't answer any Tweets or retweet anything during this investigation even if they are from people you know!

DC GOODY
What not even from my mum sir?

DCI HARRIS
(CONSIDERS) Is she making her apple crumble tonight?

Marc P taken by elbow and escorted to cloak room.

Nice try though and better than mine.

I don't want to go back in the closet!

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