British Comedy Guide

Status report Page 5,186

It's never about what you say it's about how you say it.

MAN: Tickle your arse with a feather?

WOMAN: I beg your pardon?!

MAN: I said particularly nasty weather.

Quote: Raymond Terrific @ July 27 2013, 8:55 AM BST

If a female stranger paid me a degrading, inappropriate compliment I probably wouldn't complain about that either to be honest.

The man has a point.

Quote: Marc P @ July 27 2013, 9:01 AM BST

It's never about what you say it's about how you say it.

MAN: Tickle your arse with a feather?

WOMAN: I beg your pardon?!

MAN: I said particularly nasty weather.

Laughing out loud

No better feeling than a random compliment.

A man stopped me in the street on the way to work last week and said "I just wanted to tell you that I see you every morning, and I think you are beautiful. Although you could do with brushing your hair a bit more."

Didn't know whether to be offended or not!

Take it as a compliment with a side helping of constructive criticism!

Just give him the brush off next time. Ba-dum.

Comb again?

Chip's just been out cutting the hedge. He felt like Leatherface out of Texas Chainsaw Massacre. But with a hedge strimmer instead of a chainsaw. And he wasn't wearing somebody elses face as a mask.

Ben is remembering the quirky days of dial up internet access.

Quote: chipolata @ July 27 2013, 10:16 AM BST

But with a hedge strimmer instead of a chainsaw. And he wasn't wearing somebody elses face as a mask.

Laughing out loud

To be fair, a hedge strimmer could probably do more damaged compared to the more "clean cut" chain saw.

Ben is watching that thing with Robert Pattinson and Catherine Tate in, finishing off a cup of tea and then heading off to a farm shop.

Quote: Jennie @ July 27 2013, 9:23 AM BST

No better feeling than a random compliment.

A man stopped me in the street on the way to work last week and said "I just wanted to tell you that I see you every morning, and I think you are beautiful. Although you could do with brushing your hair a bit more."

Didn't know whether to be offended or not!

I was talking to the lady with the Afghan behind you

we've got our first date next week

Quote: Jennie @ July 27 2013, 9:23 AM BST

No better feeling than a random compliment.

A man stopped me in the street on the way to work last week and said "I just wanted to tell you that I see you every morning, and I think you are beautiful. Although you could do with brushing your hair a bit more."

Didn't know whether to be offended or not!

The f**ker has pinched my technique - hard praise followed by a small fart of criticism to add verisimilitude.

I was sitting in the pub last evening, minding my own business and watching a man play the fruit machine, when I was shocked to see that the machines now have slots for notes !

What next? Credit card readers?

Quote: Jennie @ July 27 2013, 9:23 AM BST

No better feeling than a random compliment.

A man stopped me in the street on the way to work last week and said "I just wanted to tell you that I see you every morning, and I think you are beautiful. Although you could do with brushing your hair a bit more."

Didn't know whether to be offended or not!

Wear a Cure T-shirt and some badges, and next time tell him that Robert Smith says hairbrushes are the Anti-Christ.

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Quote: Oldrocker @ July 27 2013, 1:55 PM BST

I was sitting in the pub last evening, minding my own business and watching a man play the fruit machine, when I was shocked to see that the machines now have slots for notes !

What next? Credit card readers?

aka online gambling. We're there already. :(

I remember the good old days of the Football Pools, the tinge of excitement when we checked the scores, and the inevitable crushing disappointment. :)

Ben got sausages, sausage rolls and a pork pie from the farm shop.

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