British Comedy Guide

Status report Page 5,185

Quote: zooo @ July 26 2013, 10:59 AM BST

:D

You look perfect for any kid's party.

P.S. The Times paywall is down! *reads all of The Times*

Bummer. They've fixed it

Oh bugger.

*slaps Lee on the arse*

*casually walks away wolf-whistling*

:$

Quote: billwill @ July 26 2013, 12:46 PM BST

Well done..
Are you sure 2 weeks is enuff?

I reckoned 1 week would be enough but doubled it to be sure. They bit my hand off :)

Quote: Tuumble @ July 26 2013, 11:31 AM BST

I would never have used the word 'stunning' but as I did think 'Wow!' when I saw her I felt I wanted to say something.

I'm clued up enough on her as a person to know I would need to choose my words carefully and 'you look nice' would be probably the most I could've got away with. That scarcely seemed adequate somehow.

It's probably safer to just compliment a part of them. Like their hair. Or their cardy. That's acceptable. It's when you compliment the whole package it doesn't really work.

Quote: chipolata @ July 26 2013, 6:36 PM BST

It's probably safer to just compliment a part of them. Like their hair. Or their cardy.

But not tits, right?
Just checking.

Chip's off.

Quote: Lazzard @ July 26 2013, 6:39 PM BST

But not tits, right?

Welllll, some women might quite like it.

https://www.comedy.co.uk/profile/l.e./

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ July 26 2013, 10:40 AM BST

Nothing to do with writing but work.

I just got a contract from a company in Mauritius to write software
For a failed screen on one of their machines.
They are sending me a new screen overseas and I shall program it for the next 2 weeks.
I told them the price and it was many thousands and they paid me fully withing 10 minutes.

Just had a good rub of my hands in excitement. I will get that new car now. :)

Not nearly as satisfying as finding out you'd written the One Millionth post here though, right?!

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ July 26 2013, 11:39 AM BST

An office I go to 2/3 times a week has two women there.
I have to sign into the company there and I always pay them both compliments.
But it's done jokingly and they always laugh. I try to think of a new line each time I go.

They will say something like hello Stephen, are you OK. and then my new line of the day comes in - something like I'm all the better for seeing your two beautiful faces.

But once, I had something on my mind and forgot to compliment them and it wasn't until I was leaving the office that I realised there was a sort of atmosphere. I stopped and said sorry - and then gave them a new line on how nice they looked and how it had enriched my life by seeing them.
They laughed and the status quo was resumed. Phew.

Wow! That sounds like a lot of pressure - to come up with a new line every time. You should compile them all into a book.

Do you use your Roger Moore voice when you deliver it? (Your line, that is ;) )

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Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ July 26 2013, 4:31 PM BST

I reckoned 1 week would be enough but doubled it to be sure. They bit my hand off :)

They are probably losing £1,000,000 per day because that machine is not working.

I don't think I've ever complimented a complete stranger. Can't see the point really.

You've obviously never worked in retail! It can really make someone's day though if you do it sincerely. Yesterday, a woman left her phone in the shop so I used it to call her mum and let her know. The mum obviously thought her daughter was calling so answered "Hello, beautiful one!". I got a bit panicked and told her that it wasn't her daughter, and she said "Oh, well I'm sure you're a beautiful one too!" What a nice lady. :)

Well, you know, that's not so much a man telling a woman they're beautiful. Saying that, if a female stranger paid me a random, passing compliment, I wouldn't complain.

Quote: billwill @ July 24 2013, 4:54 PM BST

They all say that... after the answer is revealed...

Smarmy Smarmy Pleased Cool

:O

Quote: Ben @ July 27 2013, 8:47 AM BST

Well, you know, that's not so much a man telling a woman they're beautiful. Saying that, if a female stranger paid me a random, passing compliment, I wouldn't complain.

If a female stranger paid me a degrading, inappropriate compliment I probably wouldn't complain about that either to be honest.

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