The 10 funniest jokes of all time according to kids

Children have voted "Why was the sand wet? Because the sea weed!" as the funniest joke of all time, according to new research by Beano.com

The research was commissioned to celebrate the launch of Beano's new national joke competition to find the funniest class in Britain. Primary schools across the UK can submit their classes' entries from April 1st 2019 online at beano.com/jokes

Their poll of 2,000 British children aged 7-12 years old reveals classic jokes have stood the test of time, with timeless gags such as "What do you call a blind dinosaur? Doyouthinkhesaurus" and "Doctor, doctor! Help, I feel like a pair of curtains! - Pull yourself together then!" featuring in the top ten.

The top 10

1. Why was the sand wet? - Because the sea weed! (52%)
2. What do you call a blind dinosaur? - Doyouthinkhesaurus. (45%)
3. What did the policeman say to his tummy? - Freeze, you're under a vest! (44%)
4. Doctor, doctor! Help, I feel like a pair of curtains! - Pull yourself together then! (42%)
5. What's the fastest vegetable? - A runner bean! (41%)
6. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? - Frostbite! (40%)
7. What's brown and sticky? - A stick! (39%)
8. What do you call a blind deer? - No eye deer. (38%)
9. Why should you be careful when it's raining cats and dogs? - You might step in a poodle! (38%)
10. Do you want to hear a joke about pizza? - Never mind, it's too cheesy (37%)

With dads notorious for their "dad jokes", 41% of those polled chose their dad as the funniest person in their family, while mum was found to tell the worst jokes (26%).

Two-thirds of kids (67%) said they hear the best jokes in the classroom and playground, and nine in ten (90%) British children say kids are funnier than adults.

Speaking about the new competition, Mike Stirling, Editorial Director at Beano, says: "The hunt to find the UK's funniest primary school-class is on! Beano is encouraging pupils up and down the country to put forward their very best jokes, gags and funnies to be in with a chance of being crowned Britain's funniest class.

"Beano has always known how naturally funny kids are, so this national competition is the perfect way to shine a spotlight on the comedians of tomorrow and add some Beano LOLZ into primary schools across the UK."

Competition entries will be judged by Beano's gag-maker experts and kids themselves online at Beano.com, with the top three classes each winning a bundle of Beano annuals, comic subscriptions and a special VIP Beano visit and joke workshop; where one will ultimately be crowned Britain's funniest class.

The announcement of the competition follows the successful launch of Beano's free "SPAG LOLZ" programme for primary schools. The programme, free to download at school.beano.com, covers six key SPAG (Spelling, Punctuation and Grammar) topics with six curriculum-based lesson plans each for KS1 and KS2. Lesson plans focus on joke writing techniques taught through SPAG; designed to help classes hone their comedy skills and inject some unique Beano fun into literacy lessons.

Classes can source further inspiration from Beano's 'Joke Generator' which hosts 80 years' worth of classic jokes and submit their entries online at beano.com/jokes.

The competition is open for entries from 1st April to 1st May 2019. Primary school pupils or teachers - on behalf of their pupils - can enter via the website.